A: The Bible, My Make-Up and Leopard-print shoes!

Diamonds and Brick Dust

2010-06-25T12:01:00.000-07:00

I don’t usually cry about baseball. Last night I did. Will’s team lost in a heartbreaker championship game to a long-time rival, and I despise losing. But that’s not why I cried.

I cried because it’s the end of an era.

For eight years my boys have played baseball on the fields at Shamrock Springs. From Instructional League T-ball, to the 5^th and 6^th grade Majors, Rocks Travel Baseball, and everything in between. And now it’s over.

Those fields hold memories too numerous to count – of hard-fought victories, of agonizing defeat, of wonderful people, of coaches that possibly have a calling other than coaching, and of amazing coaches that have impacted our lives forever.

Those fields hold the promise of tiny boys with huge dreams and untold promise…so small they can barely carry their own bat bags.

And they hold the promise of big boys who don’t smell so good after a game, who might really have the chance for baseball to help pay for college. They also hold the stark reality of boys who love a game more than it loves them – who are blessed with talent, just a talent for something other than baseball.

And those fields hold the promise of unearthing the few young men who have been given an arm or a bat that could have only come from God and no one knew it till they stepped across that white line.

Those fields hold sweet Americana – the crack of the bat, the sounds of cheering, and the smells of hot dogs and sunscreen and brick dust and summer and innocent childhood.

Those fields hold my heart.

Oh, there’ll be more baseball. Hopefully school teams, maybe Noblesville Babe Ruth, and possibly other travel teams. But it will never be the same again. Never again on the fields at Shamrock Springs. Never again through WYSI. Never again with those same precious people.

But I’m grateful for the experience and grateful to the game. I’ve learned so much during our years there - lessons in baseball that translate to lessons in life:

*Shake it off: You’re going to mess up, but in a second there will be another play and a chance to redeem yourself

*Sometimes you’re gonna get a fast ball and other times a curve: Make the best of whatever life throws you

*Stance is everything: At the plate success is about getting your weight back and having proper balance. Success in life is about balance, too.

*Losing stinks: Especially when it is a hard-fought loss, but men of great character are never born out of victory alone. Losing teaches not only character, but also humility, and tenacity, and drive…it shows you what you’re made of. And it makes the wins you do get that much sweeter.

*Composure: Especially on the mound, composure is key. No matter the call, no matter how much the strike zone seems to move in a given game, no matter how much it is not going your way, hold that head up, get those shoulders back, and run onto that field (or stare down that batter as you wind up) like you have total command – even when you don’t feel like you do. Same is true in life.

*Hit hard, run fast, give it all you’ve got, and then come home. Home should always be the place you most want to get back to.

*If the coach says to take, you gotta take, even when you want to swing: Sometimes God is going to get you in a situation where doing the right thing or waiting or taking the lesser path (getting a walk when you wanted to be a power hitter) isn’t what you want to do, but He can see the bigger picture and He knows what’s best. You’re smart to be obedient.

*Communication is everything: From signals to yelling “mine”, the team can’t work if the team isn’t talking.

*Attitude matters: skill is really important, but you can be highly skilled and have a horrible attitude – and you’ll get no where fast.

*Good sportsmanship always wins: You earn my respect when you display good sportsmanship both on and off the field. It always wins…even when you lose.

And so goes life. Both the good and the bad always do end. I know there are more great and fun and wonderful things ahead with my boys. But this? This was extra sweet.

For all that the game is…

For all that it taught us…

For the role it played in shaping my sweet little boys into fine young men…

Baseball will always hold my heart.

A special thanks to Coach McCool, Coach Nicole, and Coach Crupi. Words will never express the blessing you’ve been over the years and the influence you've had.

Great...or Right

2010-06-23T12:11:00.000-07:00

Great…or Right...

I’ve been praying a lot about a particular thing over the last several months. It’s something that causes me to need to surrender to God every single day. It’s something that I have no control over, at least not right now. It’s something that is really making me step out in faith on several levels. And it’s something that can easily overwhelm me, cause me worry, doubt, and even dread if I let it.

But prayer always calms me. Focuses me. Gets my head and heart back where it should be.

Yet I’ve realized that I haven’t been saying what I should say to God.

We know that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him” (Romans 8:28), and I refer to this scripture and others like it often. I find that especially when I’m looking toward something that I’m anxious about, it helps to say something like: “God, I am trying hard to hear you and to follow what I believe is your will for me, and I know you have great things for me.”

Great things.

Something about reminding myself that God has great things for me makes me feel better. I know that He does have great things for me, and He does for you, too. His plan for us, as we follow Him and daily seek Him, His word, His will, is not for us to continually dwell in misery. (Romans 8:28, Psalm 37:4, Matt. 11:28, Phil. 4:6, just to cite a few.)

However, the truth is that sometimes we are going to endure something miserable – an event or a season in life that frankly doesn’t seem all that great (Romans 12:12 – “be patient in affliction”). Even without being actually miserable, there are plenty of things that I’ve encountered in my forty years that are unpleasant, dreaded, unsettling, difficult, stinky, horrid, and that I’ve wanted delivered straight up out of. And I continue to look toward some things at this very minute that I am just really unsure about, unsure if they’ll happen, if they’ll be good, if I’ll make it through.

Sometimes, some of the things God has for me – for each of us – just aren’t great. Especially at the time. But they are necessary for me to endure in order to become who God created me to be, necessary for me to endure in order to learn a lesson that I’ll need later, necessary for me to endure in order for me to prepare to live out the calling on my life.

And so I’ve decided that while I believe with all of my heart and soul that God does have great things for me eventually, first I need to experience the right things.

The right things.

My prayer is now this: “God, as I daily try to follow the path you’ve laid out for me, to live out the purpose that I was created for, to bring glory to your name, help me to surrender wholly to you. I trust that whatever I must encounter, pleasant or unpleasant, it will be the right thing to shape me into who you have created me to be. Help me to not lose sight of that and to have a heart and a mind that are open to you on every level.”

So in my quest to live out God’s purpose, in choosing great or right, I choose right.

I choose right.

Question: Which do you choose, great or right?

Mission & Purpose

2010-02-26T19:21:00.000-08:00

When was the last time you thought about your mission in life?
Businesses have missions to help define their purpose.
Organizations in the social sector (non-profits, schools, etc.) also have them, or should.
Mission statements should answer who you serve, how you do it, and why.

For years I have had a mission statement for my classroom that was more geared to my way of approaching instruction and also a separate statement for how I live out my life mission. Recently I have re-worked them and combined the two into one big ‘ol, all-encompassing mission statement for my life.

When I really think about it, this over-arching mission IS what drives me in all that I do, whether it’s interacting with students, parents, or colleagues at school, interacting with the cashier at Kroger, or friends, or family, or anyone else who God places in my path.

Mission statements are supposed to be the lighthouses that keep guiding us back to our chosen paths. We should be checking what we do against our missions in order to stay focused. It should help us in deciding when to say “yes”, when to take on new commitments, and when to charter new ground. And each of our missions should also help us refine and define what we do, help us evaluate, and give us permission to say “no”.

I hesitated to share mine with you, but I decided to for a couple of reasons.
1. Maybe it will encourage you to write your own
2. Maybe you can help hold me accountable if you see me wavering in living mine out as I intend to be resolute in its pursuit

I was placed on earth for this main purpose: To encourage and support others
I was also placed on earth for this secondary reason: To carry out that main purpose - encourage and support others - in the secular marketplace
(What I mean by this is that sometimes those of us who are living for Christ decide to carry out our purpose in a Christian setting. I feel called to carry out my purpose in the melting pot of society and all that that means. Either setting, in my opinion, is equally necessary and important.)

Therefore, this is my life mission:
I will leave a legacy that is shaped by how I treat others and how I reflect the light of Christ in all that I do. I will love others well, be the "hands and feet" in every opportunity, and enhance the lives of all I encounter through inspiration, encouragement, and support. I will give of self and resources sacrificially, and serve with humility, compassion, and excellence so that I leave a positive and lasting mark on the world and one day I hear, "Well done, my good and faithful servant!"

Do I always hit the mark, every day, every time? Of course not…I’m human. But living it every minute is the goal. Some days I fall short. Some days I don’t love well, some days I miss opportunities to be the hands and feet, some days I’m grouchy. Some days I am not serving with compassion and excellence – especially those I love most. Of course, some days I wonder if my boys’ mission statements include a line about breaking their mother’s spirit with their picking and fighting with each other and never putting their dishes in the dishwasher!!!

But if every day I wake up and living out this mission is what drives me, what I check everything against, what I filter my interactions and reactions through, then I think I have a pretty good chance of getting better every day, leaving a positive and impactful legacy, and hearing “Well done!”

I encourage you to wrestle with your mission and purpose if you haven’t.
How? The best way is to spend some quiet time alone with God and ask him to reveal it to you. There are also several great books that can help you discern what it is, but know that it is probably something very simple that you can do in multiple settings and job situations (as mine is encourage and support, which can be done through many avenues). It also likely has something to do with your natural gifting, passion, and hard-wiring, something that you're inclined to do already, but if you were really cognizant of it, focused on it, you could really use it to build the Kingdom.

How you live out that very simple theme will be determined by the passion that burns at your core. For instance, you could discover that your purpose is to help others. If your passion is medicine and science, you might live out that purpose by becoming a neurosurgeon. But if that is your purpose and you love the elderly, you might live that out by working or volunteering in a nursing home. The purpose here is simple and is a universal theme, how it is lived out is highly personal and tied to the person’s passion and gifting.

How do you craft a mission statement? Jot down some notes about what you want your life to be about – to stand for – what you will do, for whom you will do it (your family, your church, the world), and why you will do it. Ask God to help you define it if you’re having trouble. Don’t worry if it’s perfectly written or if it’s pretty. Don’t worry what anyone else would say about it. No one else even has to see it. It’s just for your benefit.

Keep it where you can see it. Read it every day. Let it guide you. Check what you do against it; filter your words and actions through it.

It’s your life. It’s your purpose. It’s your mission.

Live a life that has your mission written all over it, and your own powerful, unmistakable legacy will be born.

Question: What is your life mission? Why? Will you take the time and effort to put it on paper?

A Little Encouragement & Appreciation

2010-01-14T14:09:00.000-08:00

Maybe I notice the lack of vocalized appreciation in this world because encouraging others is part of my life purpose, but the world is sorely lacking here! Maybe I notice it because it sure does go a long way for a teacher in the long, cold, gray days of January. I probably notice it because I’m focused on it: I’ve been naturally doing it my whole life…not because I’m so fabulous, there’s plenty of stuff that I stink at – that I’m not gifted at, but I am gifted to show appreciation, to encourage, and to fill others up. It comes easily for me. It’s part of my life mission. Part of my mission is to be in a mode of continually doing it myself, and part of my mission is to challenge others to do it, as well.

“The deepest principle of human nature is a craving to be appreciated.”
-William James

I think some people feel appreciative, but they don’t know how to show it, what to say, or how to say it. Maybe some people feel that saying it sounds like they are trying to gain favor in the other person’s eyes, especially if that person is their superior (but those in leadership need to be inspired, too, and I believe that you can inspire “up”). Maybe what holds people back is that they think if they show appreciation to person A, person B will feel like they didn’t do something right. All of those things are obstacles that we put in our very own way…unfounded reasons that hold us back from doing what is life-giving to another.

Studies show that some employers have the misconception that if they show too much appreciation, employees’ work will diminish. The data proves that this is not the case as long as rewards, recognition, and appreciation are deserved, specific, and timely.

Giving encouragement and showing appreciation is so much more than a common practice in great work environments and well-functioning families. We are called to do it. It is expected of us if we are trying to follow in the footsteps of Jesus. The Bible is filled with examples of our being called to encourage and up-lift others. There are far too many passages to list, but here are a few:
Acts 20:1-2: When the uproar had ended, Paul sent for the disciples and, after encouraging them, said good-by and set out for Macedonia. He traveled through that area, speaking many words of encouragement to the people, and finally arrived in Greece.

Acts 13: After the reading from the Law and the Prophets, the synagogue rulers sent word to them, saying, "Brothers, if you have a message of encouragement for the people, please speak."

2 Samuel19:7: Now go out and encourage your men. I swear by the LORD that if you don't go out, not a man will be left with you by nightfall. This will be worse for you than all the calamities that have come upon you from your youth till now.

Job 16:5: But my mouth would encourage you; comfort from my lips would bring you relief.

The examples show supporting another believer in his walk with Christ, inspiring groups through acknowledging their dreams, goals and purpose, and even encouraging others to press on in the face of adversity, when they feel most like giving up.

My husband says that it just isn’t realistic to think we’d see that in the workplace – or anywhere else, that he sees too many places where it just isn’t part of the “culture”. I agree with what he sees, but that doesn’t make it ok, and that only fuels my fire to set about changing it! Barbara Glanz writes that “the need to be validated and appreciated as a worthwhile human being is greater than ever before, especially in our schools and our workplaces. A recent study indicated that last year 65% of our workforce reported that they had received no appreciation for the good work they had done.”

I can’t tell you how sad that makes me! And yet I know it to be true…I see it all around me. I see it in the workplaces of almost everyone I know and in many families, churches, and organizations, too. Why? I don’t know, and that’s why I’m on a mission to change it. It costs nothing, takes relatively little time, and even makes the one giving the encouragement or appreciation feel great.

“You never know when a moment and a few sincere words can have an impact on a life.” –Zig Ziglar

By speaking life into others, we help them stay on the right path when they feel they can’t take another step. We help them feel important, acknowledged, listened to, and loved. We show them that they matter. We confirm that their excellent work is significant…which ultimately causes them to want to do more excellent work. We show them that they are not forgotten. We remind them that the hard times won’t last. We may speak just the right words that cause them to hang on just a little longer…until the tide turns. We are, for just a moment, the very voice of God whispering to their hearts.

Over-achievers who are shown appreciation work even harder.
Under-achievers who are shown appreciation start to raise their game.
Friends who are encouraged are kinder.
Husbands and wives who show each other appreciation start to reciprocate.
Children who are shown appreciation start to “do” without being asked.
Team members who are encouraged try harder.
Bosses who are shown appreciation go to greater lengths.

“Sometimes our light goes out but is blown again into flame by an encounter with another human being. Each of us owes the deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this inner light.”
-Albert Schweitzer

So, that’s my challenge to you: rekindle someone else’s light today. A kind word, or my very favorite – the hand-written note, is all it takes. For no other reason than because it needs to be said, because it’s the right thing to do, because it’s life-giving. The woman who cleans the office restrooms needs to hear it. The guy at the gas station needs to hear it. Your friend needs to hear it. The daycare worker needs to hear it. And so does your child and your husband and your boss and your co-worker.

…And just imagine how the world might start to change.

Just imagine how the world might start to change if we all started to serve for absolutely no earthly thanks or reward and began to express thanks and appreciation like people’s very lives depended on it.

Question: Who will you encourage and show appreciation to today?

Waving the White Flag

2009-12-31T21:45:00.000-08:00

If you know me well, or at least if you read my blog post from Dec. 31st last year, you know I’m not a big fan of New Year’s Eve. I haven’t actually figured out a good way to either explain or justify my disdain for the turn of the calendar except to say that I am just that sentimental. It doesn’t make sense, given that I am a really forward-looking, future-planning person. I’m complicated that way.

Yesterday I was telling my friend Lisa how my head was about to explode because I had spent the day being excessively introspective and analytical about 2009 and was trying to be much too detailed in my planning and laying down a strategy for success in 2010. Lisa laughed as she said she’s too laid back and doesn’t do that enough, and she suggested that she needed to learn more about that. But I actually think I have a lot to learn from her!

One of my goals for 2010 is to spend more time doing some things that I love and miss like being crafty. In searching for some clever ideas, I came across Stephanie Ackerman’s blog, http://www.homegrownhospitality.typepad.com/ . If you are a crafter, you’ll love it! Stephanie has a great idea: word of the year.

I want my word to be significant to the journey I anticipate in 2010 and significant to me as a person. Even better, I want it to be significant to my walk with Christ…A word that I’ll look at, think about, and study continually.

My word for 2010 is surrender.

If you’ve only thought about the secular meaning of it, and haven’t thought much about it in the context of The Kingdom of God, the word surrender can have a negative connotation. However, our surrendering is not only a demonstration of our faith, it also pleases God. It just happens to be really, really hard for us highly type-A chicks who like to take charge of everything and everyone! But in the Kingdom Context surrender doesn’t mean give UP and throw in the towel. In this case it means to give IN and follow Christ, trusting that He is fully in control.

God’s been teaching me a lot about surrender for what seems like years. Apparently I am in the remedial surrender course, & I don’t make the progress He’d like – still trying to control things myself- or I’d have this lesson down by now! But I realize this about myself, and am ready to take it on…I need to take it on.

Matthew 10:39: He that finds his life shall lose it: and he that loses his life for my sake shall find it.

I’ll have to contemplate the word surrender daily and meditate on it to remind myself that I am waving the white flag and allowing God to take total control.

So, I surrender 2009 and my fear of the unknown in 2010.
I surrender my need to do it all. (I believe God calls us to be excellent in all we do…so I’ll do less, but do it excellently and for Him.)
I surrender my need to control.
I surrender my angst about the car (post coming about this).
I surrender the 529, 403B, and all the others (2009 was not kind to our investments!).
I surrender trying to achieve balance.
I surrender school.
I surrender my business.
I surrender my time, my money, my talent.
I surrender my desire to serve where I see the need in order to follow Him where He connects me to the need that only He can see.
I surrender to following His nudges.
I surrender to Him…
I…surrender…

And so here I am, waving that white flag to signal the crossing of the finish line for 2009 and the ushering in of 2010, and I’m giving it all over to God. Every last bit. For when we are willing to become powerless in His name is the exact moment that we gain the ability to accomplish His goals, by His power, for His glory.

And that’s all I’ve ever wanted.

Question: What will your word for 2010 be? Why is that word significant to you?

When You Least Expect It

2009-12-17T12:29:00.000-08:00

As my boys get older it is becoming harder and harder to make magical Christmas moments – the kind where they scream in delight, pixie dust and glitter is swirling, and time stands still.

This year we accomplished it – it just happened to be 2 weeks before Christmas! Last Sunday the boys were lounging around, trying to talk us into doing something fun. I was complaining about them watching too much football and embellishing a little about all I had to do that day. Then we asked if they’d like an early Christmas present…and what kid would say no to that?

But we did it! We pulled it off! They DID scream in delight - loudly! The pixie dust and glitter DID swirl! Time DID stand still, but just for a minute as the boys realized they were unwrapping tickets to that day’s Colts game! They sprinted upstairs to put on their Colt’s jerseys, we loaded up the car, and we hit the road!

The game was awesome, the experience all we’d hoped for, and the family bonding full-on.

The game ended and we left, having loved every minute of it.
That's when God showed up…

Let me set the scene: We are walking out of Lucas Oil Stadium with the rest of the 65,000 that were there – 65,000. It is chaotic. It is loud, really, really loud. Just outside the door you have to walk through a dark, echoing tunnel. In that tunnel are several guys playing drums, loudly. We are trying to talk about the game, not lose the boys, and hurry since it is cold. I can’t emphasize the noise & chaos enough.

I notice someone I know ahead of me to my left. I watch her. Then I turn my head to the right, make eye contact with the drumming guys and smile while thinking I should throw some money in the bucket by their feet.

Then I look straight ahead and stop dead in my tracks.

Straight in front of me and only a couple of feet from my face is a lady, older than I am. She looks me dead in the eye and here’s what happens next:
She says: Ma’am, do you have $25 so I can feed my kids?
I say: Yes, I do. I carry an envelope for this very purpose.
I lean in close and say: Tell me what you need.
She says: If I had $40 I could get enough food for the week.
I start to fumble in my messy purse, reaching for the envelope that I carry just for this very thing. It is so dark in the tunnel that I can barely see. My family is getting too far ahead of me…the tunnel is too loud – too many people rushing by us, yet time for this lady and me is irrelevant. I’m afraid I’m scaring her as I repeatedly yell to my family to “wait!”
Finally they stop, but are far ahead of me and really have no idea of what is going on.
She helps me hold my purse up so I can see.
I am completely calm and feel no fear.
I pull out a $50 bill.
Before handing it to her I ask: Do you know who this is from?
She answers: Jesus
I reply: Yes, it is and He wants you to know that He loves you.
I hand her the money and I start to cry.
She hugs me tight and says: Don’t cry. He blessed you so you could bless me. I love you.
I say: I love you, too, and I know you’ll be OK. I’ll be praying for you.
We part, I catch up with my family, and that was that.

A miracle right there in that tunnel.

She picked me out of 65,000 people because God nudged her that I was willing and prepared to meet her need. I responded because I was ready and am looking for those miracle encounters every single place I go.

You may think I’ve lost my mind. That’s OK with me.
You may think I'm looking for credit. I'm not. I share this with you, not for credit – for the only credit belongs to God. I share it to illustrate that God is alive and working and wants to do miraculous things at every turn, but we need to be willing to be his hands and feet. If you don’t believe me read, “You Were Born for This” by Bruce Wilkinson. It will change your life and the lives of those around you.

What’s funny is that I’d been hoping to be a miracle delivery agent for days, and every person whom I’d come across had caused me to question, “It is her?” “Is he the one?”, yet nothing - no nudges from God to act. And then on that day, when I was totally focused on my boys’ Christmas joy and pulling off that great Christmas surprise, God had an even bigger Christmas surprise in store for me.

I’ll never forget last Sunday’s events. It was a perfect day from start to finish – every last bit of it. God is crazy like that…just like we used to say in middle school, “When you least expect it...expect it!” It’s a craziness that is hard to explain, but I adore being part of it. My friend Philippe says, “It shouldn’t seem crazy…that’s just how The Kingdom works!” And Philippe is right!

So this Christmas I challenge you to embrace the craziness of an active, living Kingdom of God and be ready to be part of miracles wherever you go!

Question: Do you believe that God delivers miracles today and wants our help in making them happen?

Hold Tight

2009-12-17T11:22:00.000-08:00

Christmas can bring out some intense emotions in people, ranging from the very best to the very worst. It can conjure up memories both dear and horrid, cause both elation and depression, and can make you see people in a whole new light. It can bring out the most giving, caring parts of our souls. And, as stated in Four Christmases (one of my favorite movies of all time), “You can’t spell families without lies”.

We see the very best demonstrated through people’s unselfish giving, through their coming together, through their thinking of others at this time of year unlike any other time.

We see their worst through fighting for deals, cutting other drivers off, stealing the closest parking places from little old ladies that have been waiting with their turn signals on for minutes by flooring it in before they even knew what happened! We see their worst through families bickering over time slots and visitation and who has to travel and even dredging up old hurts for revenge.

We see the extremes in those we know well and dearly love and in those we’ve never even met, but can observe or even feel the ripple effect.

On Thanksgiving I was talking to a family friend who was about to embark on her first-ever “Day After Thanksgiving Sale”. I listed for her the pros and cons and then told her about the first (and last) time I ever shopped on that day. I hate crowds, like sleep waaaay to much to be in the line outside of Target freezing at 4:30 a.m., and then fighting mean spirited people just to save a buck….cause nothin’ says the Birth of the Baby Jesus like being elbowed and trampled to save $20 on a PlayStation Game!!! No thanks!

Then I had to talk my own self off the ledge when I became seriously overwhelmed while trying to make my house look like it was about to be the subject of an HGTV Holiday Special. It was 8:00 on a Sunday night with a big soirée set to happen at my house in a few days. Lights for the tree from last year seemed to have lost their little twinkle…no problem…just run to Target.

But Behold! There were no lights in Target.

Off to Wal-Mart and getting irritated. Behold! No lights there either! Where’s the innkeeper when I need him? As I was scanning the aisle for white lights with a green cord (a combination that is apparently quite in demand yet unbeknownst to most retailers) another lady appeared who was looking for the same thing. I could tell she felt competitive about it, too, as I sensed her growing hostility. (Well, that and the lunges as she prepared to sprint…) I was tired. I was getting crabby. I could not fathom why the corporate buyers couldn’t understand my holiday needs.

I began the self talk: “I will not cry. I will not cry. Birth of the Baby Jesus. Birth of the Baby Jesus.”
Almost 2 hours later I was home finishing the tree, having spent about 3 hours, two trips to CVS, and laying down several more dollars than I should have needed to!

The soirée went off without a hitch and all the little details ended up being put in perspective where they belonged. What’s really funny is yesterday all of the lights on the tree just went out. All of them. I have no idea why…and get this: I don’t even care!

In the last two weeks I’ve had countless reminders about the important little things. I don’t even want anything for Christmas but to spend uninterrupted time with my family, snuggled up watching movies, talking, and having fun.

I just want to hold tight.

I want to remember how lucky I am that they are alive, that no one is in Iraq, that we are healthy, that while we could always have more, we sure have enough. I want to remember how lucky I am to live in this country, to worship freely, and to have opportunities. I want to remember how lucky I am to have someone to hold tight to.

And I want that for you.

This Christmas hold tight to those you love, feel blessed that you can, and let go of all the rest. Hold tight to the promise of that baby in the manger that was born and that died for you and me. And hold tight to the promise of a glorious eternity in Heaven.

Merry Christmas!

Question: What do you most want for Christmas? Why?

“Your Little Lights Aren’t Twinkling…”

2009-12-12T06:34:00.000-08:00

If you know me at all, you know that 50% of what I say is movie quotes that have been woven into my normal conversations. My husband does the very same thing, which makes us almost have a language of our own at times (unless you’ve seen the movies enough times to recognize the quotes).

There are six movies in my top five movies of all time (I know…) and most of the quotes come from those. Especially Christmas Vacation. In fact, quotes from Christmas Vacation are so over-used in our family that it’s really kind of ridiculous…embarrassing even! I love that movie! This year alone I’ve already watched it 5 times and it’s not even the middle of December yet.

One of my favorite parts is when Clark can’t get the exterior illumination to light…all 25,000 bulbs. Clark’s father-in-law points out the obvious, “Your little lights aren’t twinkling…” and Clark answers, “I know, Art, and thanks for noticing.”

I love exterior illumination!! At our house we are much more subtle with the outside lighting, but I’m 100% in favor of other people being completely out of control with it!
I love to notice people’s decorations when I’m driving, especially at night.
It always makes me feel happy…
It even makes me feel connected…

In fact, it makes me feel like I can identify all the other Christians in the world that way.
I want to believe that every single bit of exterior illumination marks the houses of those who believe that Jesus is Lord and that this is the season that we proclaim His power and then we set about living it out loud for the whole rest of the year.

I want to believe this: “Oooo! Pretty lights! They’re celebrating the birth of Jesus.” “Oh, look! They are believers, too!”

Yes, I know that there are a high percentage of non-Christians who are celebrating the secular side of Christmas and that they do in fact have exterior holiday lighting.
Yes, I know that I sometimes live in “Alyssa Land”: a world where all is good, everyone knows Jesus, and everyone loves Christmas as much as Buddy the Elf – but for all the right reasons. Deep down somewhere in me, I know that isn’t real life. But I love to pretend.

Wouldn’t it be amazing if that were true?
Wouldn’t it be amazing if all the lights shouted to the world that the people in those houses loved Jesus…and if you needed help or encouragement or a miracle that those were the doors upon which you should knock?
Wouldn’t it be amazing if the people in every one of those houses went on to live as Christians every single day till it was time to put those lights up again?
Can you imagine?

As we seek Christ, as we find Him, as we follow Him, we shall have the Christmas spirit, not for one fleeting day each year, but as a companion always." -T. S. Monson

Can you imagine if we all really lived out this quote every single one of the 364 remaining days of the year? Every year?

What if we left those lights on all the time, year round, to mark our houses so that other believers could find community and non-believers could seek solace and compassion there?

I know everyone will take them down. I guess we will, too, so as not to be the basis for that line in Redneck Woman. But you can bet that I’m going to make an effort to live a life where my lights are twinkling “the whole year through”…where my lights twinkle as much for the Cousin Eddies & Ruby Sues of the world as they do for my family…where I extend grace equally when trees go up in flames, dogs and squirrels destroy the house, or crazy cousins park worn down RVs in my driveway (maybe not as much for emptying the tank into the storm sewer…) as I do when all is well with the world.

It’ll be hard, but I’ll try.

How about you? Will your little lights be twinkling?

Question: How will you live Christmas “the whole year through”?

So Very Thankful

2009-11-17T11:20:00.000-08:00

So very thankful for friends and family
For my precious twins and my soul-mate husband
For healthy parents who live nearby
For Diet Coke
For Charmin Ultra
For the Sunday Star read on the velvet chaise lounge in my kitchen
For deodorant and Always
For throaty V-8 engines with killer stereos that blare Van Halen 1984
For rag tops thrown back on sunny summer days
For this great country
So thankful for bosses who do not micromanage
For indoor plumbing and steamy hot showers
For electric blankets and toasty fires
For peptides and hyaluronic filling spheres
For skilled hair stylists and Kenra 25
For cameras
For great shoes
For the trailblazing women who’ve gone before me
For strong men
For Carol Anderson and Ann Taylor
So thankful for El Jaripeo
For electricity
For mascara and lipstick
For Glee and The Office
For Cousin Eddie and Clark and Ruby Sue
For cards mailed with stamps
For photos and scrapbooks and memories that grip your soul
For time spent and tears shed
For howling laughter and deep mourning
So very thankful for opportunities not missed
For lessons learned
For mountains climbed and valleys survived
For knowing the value of a hard day’s work
For loving well and being well loved
For baseball and pianos and songs sung with your whole heart
For trumpets and jokes and paintings and stories
For prayers and goodnight kisses
For fresh cookies and warm bread with real butter
For foot massages and snugly boys
So thankful for passion that burns deep
For hurts and healing and fear and nudges
For life lived and not missed
And for Christ’s blood shed for both you and me

Happy Thanksgiving

Question: What are you thankful for?

35 Minutes Anywhere, Frankly

2009-11-09T10:55:00.000-08:00

I really love Rascal Flatts!...I mean luuuuv them…Have seen ‘em several times live & have even been back stage (super cool). I love so many of their songs… (I interrupt this blog to suggest a really great Christmas present for anyone looking to buy me something life-changing: I want them to come over for dinner, I’ll make whatever Gary wants, and then we will all sit around my living room and I get to sing with them…every single song! Heaven.) …Anyway, one of their songs that really makes me think is Mayberry.

What they sing? I agree.

The world spins way too fast.
We need to slow down.
Take some time.
Connect.

I’d like to add another verse, too. Something about turning off the technology and actually looking each other in the eye, talking – deeply. Embracing. Sitting. Abiding…

I recently attended a leadership conference at my church that was filled with outstanding points. One of them was that we have to connect with God. I agree.
Daily. I agree.
The next point was new…and freeing:
Some of us love to read the bible and journal, in the morning, for the oft-proposed 35 minute block of uninterrupted time, and if you love it, absolutely do it. But this point was also made:
That’s not how all of us connect to God.
That’s not how all of us connect and it’s OK.
And in scripture, Jesus connected with His own Father in all kinds of ways, at all kinds of times. Jesus was not boxed into 35 minutes of journal writing every morning. And we are certainly not meant to close that journal after 35 minutes and say, “OK, God…great talk! See you tomorrow!”

WOW!

In fact, some people have been made to feel guilty and inadequate because they find journaling to be a chore…and they’re not morning people…and if they’ve got 7 kids under the age of 5, they don’t have 35 minutes in a row. Ever.

The speaker asked us to concentrate on our times of most powerful connection with God.
Mine?
I do love to read and ponder scripture.
Journaling…not so much.
In the morning…rarely.
But 35 minutes, when I gotta get out the door…That’s a laugh.
(I know some of you are thinking, “Just set your alarm for earlier, sister!”…Apparently, you don’t know me well enough. Night owl…God wired me like that…Hmmmm…)

Maybe it’s just that I can’t be that boxed in.
Maybe it’s because I don’t like other people telling me the best way for me to connect with God.
Maybe it’s because this life-long goody-two-shoes has a rebellious streak when someone wants me to do it like everyone else.

But this much I know to be true:
God wants us to connect with Him. Daily.
He wants a deep, abiding, rich, personal relationship with us.
He cares about every little detail of our lives.
And how about this radical thought? He wants us jotting down the insights he sends to us, running to look up a verse in scripture, sending up prayers right and left, talking and joking (yes, I really did say that!) all day long.
All. Day. Long.
I really doubt that He is concerned with all of the other stuff surrounding how we get there…just as long as we do get there.

Some of my most powerful moments and deepest connections have been late, late at night. Some have been while witnessing some spectacular aesthetic in nature. Some have been while witnessing to another person. Some have been while serving another person. Some have been while realizing how small and insignificant I really am. Some have been in the shower, where streams of tears join a river of steamy water. Many have occurred in the car. Many more have involved music.

Were those any less significant because they were not from 6:00 to 6:35am with a pen and a journal? Of course not.

So be free to experience God in your way. In your time. Throughout the day. All day. But every day. With no guilt about how. At least 35 minutes total, anywhere, frankly…just me and the power of God…just you and the power of God.

The point about connecting with Him is this: Just find a way to do it!

This Old House

2009-10-12T20:08:00.000-07:00

A few days ago I had to run an errand that caused me to drive past the house we moved out of almost 3 years ago.

It looked nice…well cared for… But it was mine for seven years and yet it didn’t look like me at all. I’m glad I didn’t see the inside. I’m sure it’s clean. I’m sure they’re taking good care of it. But I’m sure it would be even less recognizable to me than the outside is.

We built that house. We poured our hearts and souls into it, we nurtured every bit of it, and we painstakingly chose every interior and exterior detail from finishing the basement to adding molding in every last spot, from the landscaping to the back porch we added on.

It’s strange to drive by a house you once lived in…like you know it like the back of your hand and find it completely unrecognizable all at the same time. It creates this strange disconnected connection that I can barely explain.

I drove away feeling grateful for that house…it was perfect for us at the time…but grateful to not live there now since it doesn’t seem to fit me anymore. I felt even more grateful, though, for our current house…it is perfect for us right here, right now…and I think it looks like me & it certainly feels like me.

It made me think about our lives as we grow in relationship with Jesus. As we move from “unbeliever” to “believer” we change in some big ways. Our old selves are as unrecognizable as the house I describe. We can look back on our time before having a personal relationship with Jesus and not even relate to that person we were before. It’s still the same “house”, but what inhabits it – or WHO inhabits it - has changed significantly!

Because of Jesus we are changed.
Because of Him we are made new.
And when we pursue Him daily, we continually grow and evolve into the people that He created us to be.

And just like I felt about our old house, we can be grateful for who we were, where we were at the time, but even more grateful for what we’ve become in Christ, having grown to fit His image of us.

May Christ forever dwell within you!

Question: How have you changed as you’ve grown in relationship with Christ? Do you even recognize your previous self?

To 6th Grade Boys Everywhere…

2009-10-06T19:34:00.000-07:00

Dear 6th Grade Boys,

We, your mothers, want to remind you of a few very important life lessons. These are lessons that you just have to accept, so don’t argue with us (you won’t win anyway). This is just how it is, and the sooner you learn and accept the following, the easier your lives will be.

1.) Deodorant DOES NOT help stink that you already have! It’s as simple as right & wrong, up & down:
Soap is for stink you already have.
Deod is for stink you don’t want to get.
We simply can’t explain this anymore! So, every time you take a shower and rid yourself of your previous stink, you MUST reapply new deod as a stink-preventing measure! End of story!

2.) Wrinkly shirts make you look like you don’t care. And maybe you don’t. But like it or not, you’re now at the age when it will serve you well to at least act like you do!

3.) You have to wash your face! We don’t care if you don’t want to or you don’t like it. When you don’t, you get pimples. Yes, we mothers do love you enough to pop them…for 12 years now we’ve run the gamut of blood, puke, snot, & urine. Trust us, a little pimple poppin’ ain’t gonna scare us away! So you have a choice to make: us chasin’ you down with toner-laden cotton balls or you can take care of it yourselves.

4.) We’re not expecting you to be like some of those adorable, charming, melt-a-mother’s heart 12-year olds that we see on TV sometimes, but we do expect you to master and use 3 or 4 social phrases such as “nice to meet you”, “great to see you again”, “I _______ (play baseball, play the trumpet, am interested in U.S. History…) – thanks for asking.”, and “I’m fine, thank you. How are you?”

5.) Think something and know why you think it. Even if you don’t agree with your brilliant mothers on everything, take a stand and be able to defend it! We want you to be leaders, not followers.

6.) We’ve taught you manners. Could you at least use them sometimes so we know you “got it”? Whether you’re the President or simply invited to the White House someday (as we know you will be – you’re just that fabulous!), you’ll need to know which fork is for salad, which spoon is for dessert, and to chew with your mouths closed!

7.) We know you love bathroom words…words that describe bodily functions…words that gross a mother out. We know it, even though we don’t like or understand it. But there IS a time and place, for the love of Pete…and the dining room table at Grandma’s is not it!

8.) You are now at the age when you must take personal responsibility for your own faith, your relationship with Jesus Christ. We’ve tried our best. We’ve taught you right. We’ve told you how it is. We’ve taken you to church. We hope you understand now that your actions and beliefs have consequences…eternal ones. Now it’s time for you to take the reigns. We want you to long outlive us, have decades of happy and productive lives. But if you die tomorrow, you’ll have to stand at the feet of Jesus and answer for yourselves. Be clear about what you believe…and if you’re not, talk to someone who knows biblical truth. We say this not to be harsh, but because we love you more than life itself. We know this is some heavy stuff, but our first and most important job is to love you. Our second is to tell it to you straight. We want you to spend your eternity in Heaven with Jesus…nothing matters more.

No matter how tall you grow, how much armpit hair you get, and how deep your voices become, you’ll always be our babies. Nothing you could ever do would change how much we love you…unconditionally…and for all time.
Love,
Your Mothers

Hungry…Starving, Actually

2009-09-24T13:56:00.000-07:00

Do you know that feeling when you’re craving salt, so you eat some chips then think, “Nope. That wasn’t it”? So you eat some chocolate, thinking you must satisfy the need for sweet. “Nope. Not it, either.” …Back to the chips…

…You’re hungry, and you keep eating, but you sure can’t quite get full, you're never satisfied, cravings never cease, pangs don’t go away…

That’s how I am for God.

Starved. Famished. Ravenous.
Never enough.
My hunger is never satisfied, my thirst never quenched.

I seek Him daily in many places, in many ways. I nourish my soul with Christian books, Christian music, scripture, prayer, meditation…everything about Him that I can get my hands on to better know Him and to experience Him more, but it’s never enough.

These two unbelievably wonderful quotes are from Tozer:
“To have found God and still pursue Him is the soul’s paradox of love, scorned indeed by the too-easily-satisfied religionist, but justified in happy existence by the children of the burning heart.”

“We are called to an everlasting preoccupation with God.”

Psalm 42:1-2 As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. 2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God?

James 4:8 Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

Jeremiah 29:13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

The more I feed on the things of God, the hungrier I am. In seeking Him, He fills me daily, yet I’m starved for Him. And that is the same wish that I hold for each of you, my friends:
May you seek Him with all of your heart. May you be starving, famished, ravenous for God and never satisfied!

Question: How hungry are you for God? What difference do you think it makes?

40 and ????

2009-09-17T16:33:00.000-07:00

Well, I’m almost a week in. The big 4-0 came and went last Sunday and the world did not stop turning. It’s not like I’m depressed or stressed or on the verge of a mid-life crises (though I can’t be sure…).

These questions loom for me:
40 and fabulous…or frumpy?
40 and fearless…or frightened?
40 and have it all figured out…or full of it (!) ?

Maybe I’ll never know. And maybe I’m a little of each of those, depending on the moment, depending on the day.
I really hope that at age 40 I am not at the half-way point, but that is not for me to know, and I think this is the underlying reality check that causes people to stop in their tracks at these milestone birthdays and contemplate:
What did I do in the first 40 years that really matters, and what had I better get moving on starting today, right now?

In some ways I think I’ve done OK.
Yet in some ways I think I have not begun to scratch the surface of becoming who God intends for me to be.
And I wonder…is that my fault, did I stunt my own progress? Or did God not only plot my path, but also my days in which to land at each marker?

I realize the introspective nature of these questions, even the heaviness at times, but if we don’t ask, evaluate, and analyze how will we have any sense of the continuum on which we travel?

In the first 40 years I know that I have done some important things.
I also did some stupid stuff.
And I literally thank God that it’s not too late to have some great big plans for the next 40 years…to make sure that the answers ARE fabulous, fearless, and figured out, to teach some more kids to read, bring some people to Jesus, change some lives, give away thousands (let’s get crazy and say millions here, God!), raise faithful boys who live out their passions and dreams, grow old with my soul mate, embrace my friends, inspire others, shake the system & rock the boat, leave a legacy, …and change the world.

Age has no relevance for God.
Look at Abraham and Sarah and Noah.
(Side bar: Hey God, by the way, it is A-OK if we skip the childbearing at 90 business! I can NOT imagine the stretch marks from that! Whew!)
Amazing things were done to further the Kingdom of God, things that we still very much feel the ripple effect of today, by them and many more.

I just want to make sure that in the next 40 years (and beyond), everyone I come in contact with is better for having known me, and that I am the hands and feet of Jesus in my community, the face of Jesus in the crowd every single chance I get.

Gotta go! The clock is ticking, and I have to do nothing short of changing the world for the Kingdom of God!

Question: What will YOU do in the next 40 years to change the world for the Kingdom of God?

Shock & Awe

2009-09-11T13:26:00.000-07:00

I love to shock people.

Not in the “I just went and had my body completely pierced and sleeved” kind of way…
More in the “you think you have me totally figured out and you so do not, mister” kind of way.

I’ve been told I am a little high maintenance. A little complicated. A tough nut to crack.
Fine by me.
How boring would life be if we were each a Myers-Briggs ESFP? I enjoy being a complex INTJ. It is, after all, who God made me to be…for a reason. And if you know anything about Myers-Briggs and those 16 personality types, you know that my personality isn’t one known for enjoying shock value.

I am absolutely too straight-laced. Therefore, people don’t think I’m funny, so I love to surprise with an off-the-cuff funny remark.

I am extremely opinionated. I keep those opinions to myself a lot of the time so as not to cause too much eyebrow raising, but sometimes I love to listen long and hard, saying nothing, as though I might not care…or know…only to interject my opinion at the perfect moment backed by cold, hard fact.

I love to be an original and despise being copied. Just when someone thinks they have me figured out, I love to do something completely to the contrary just to keep them guessing. (For this I probably do need counseling, referrals welcome…)

But here’s my favorite: I love to shock people with the truth of Jesus, with the love of Jesus, with the heart of Jesus, and when they least expect it.

I love to shock people by doing things that are so far outside the lines of the secular world in which we live that the non-believer, or even the believer, on the receiving end is so stunned they don’t know how to respond.

Just today I had to call a company about a problem and speak to the customer service rep. I was really concerned about a breech of confidential information and the woman took care of it quickly and put my mind at ease. As we hung up I said, “You have no idea how you have helped me today. I hope God blesses you in return for how you have blessed me.”
Ya cudda heard a pin drop….
“Um, wow…thank you so much, ma’am!” was her response. Clearly she doesn’t get much of that blessing stuff at her job.
Jesus meets customer service…

A few days ago I had to call a credit card company that was trying to send me a card & all I had to do was activate it, except that I didn’t want it. I realized that they had us listed as a pending application, which “Mr. Chad McCool Envelope System” did not want on his credit. Good little Discover Card worker that she was just really wanted me to go ahead and open that account in case I ever needed it…even though I was telling her I didn’t need or want it.
I had no choice but to pull out the shock and awe!
Oh, to have seen her reaction would have been priceless when I said, “Well, we are trying hard to live by the rules of Kingdom Finance and part of that for us is following the methods of Dave Ramsey. We’re working hard to pay off all of our credit card debt and cut up our cards (!), and any other debt, so we can even start to work on the overwhelming task of paying off our mortgage in short order. It’s really going to take a lot of hard work and discipline to do all of that and continue to give like we want to. I know that your job is to extend credit, but I just really feel God laying it on my heart to be strict in this.” She laughed at me. (Hey, it ain’t the first time…and it won’t be the last!) Then she told me that she’s watched Dave Ramsey on TV a couple of times. I thanked her for helping me make sure that card didn’t become active and told her that God would bless her for helping me stay on track. I could feel the shock and awe reverberating through the phone line!
Jesus meets 1-800-discover.

Recently I made a call to a utility company. I explained that I bypassed all of the automated choices because none applied. I had to talk to a real person. I explained that I was calling so that I could pay both the current bill and the overdue bill of a family whom I knew could not pay their own. At first the man on the other end could not even understand what I was trying to do. He kept asking me who I was with, what company I was from. I kept responding with varying versions of “I’m not with any company. I’m one of a really small group of people who likes to go around paying other people’s bills.”
When he still seemed to have a bad case of shock and awe, I finally said, “I’m with Jesus.”
He very slowly answered, “We don’t get a lot of that.”
Jesus meets the utility company guy.

I hope that day that I was the vehicle for God to move for that family. I also hope I was a witness to Jesus being alive and active in this world to the guy on the other end of the phone. Very powerful stuff if I was able to do both.

Now these are some of those stories that I’ve mentioned I hesitate to share, but my dear friend Julie has convinced me that sharing it is where the real leadership is.

But here’s what you absolutely must know:
This is not about me! This is about God. Focus on God. Shock and Awe for God, by God, because of God. And it has nothing to do with me other than the fact that I am daily trying to be His hands and feet out there in my very own community, directly impacting one life at a time.

Jesus will show up anywhere that you take Him.
Oh, I know He can get there on His own, but He’s waiting to see how we’ll pack him up and carry Him with us everywhere we go.
For years I’ve been praying the prayer of Jabez. My territory IS being enlarged. But the world is full of noise and distraction and sometimes it takes more than a whisper to get people’s attention.
Sometimes it takes full-scale warfare.

Sometimes it takes shock and awe to shake the system, to sufficiently rock the boat…
…but WOW, the stories…the power of God in it…the legacy…the eternal significance…

WOW!

Question: Where have you taken Jesus today? How have you shocked and awed in His name?

In A Fog

2009-09-09T12:36:00.000-07:00

A heavy fog hangs in the early morning air as I write this.

It's the kind that we often see on September mornings in central Indiana, except maybe heavier than normal. You can almost see the droplets of precipitation that hover within it, and the air is thick with its presence.

Driving is difficult in fog like this. Every few feet is a new wall of obstruction, and only when you arrive at that wall are the next few feet unveiled.
And then the next.
And then the next.

Fog seems like such an obvious metaphor for faith in life.

Many times things seem foggy. Many times answers are so very far from clear. Many times the path is completely veiled and nothing is revealed in advance.

When we step out in faith sometimes we expect that more will be revealed to us than actually is, but it is like that foggy road with just a few feet exposed at a time. God doesn't promise to show us the whole road of our journey. He asks us to travel with Him...Him leading the way....us relying wholly on Him through His clear sight since our own vision is clouded not only by all of the distractions of life, but also by the sheer and simple fact that it is not to be known by us.

I hope you'll begin to look at fog in a whole new way: as a beautiful reminder of how God calls us to be completely dependent on Him, so much so that without Him we are unable to even order our steps for more than a few feet.

I love what Martin Luther King, Jr. says: "Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase."

Just take the first step...travel those first few feet...go that first little distance...

That is what faith is...traveling on the road we can not see and trusting that God is guiding us every step of the way.

Question: How do you allow God to guide you on your daily path?

Vera

2009-09-08T14:06:00.000-07:00

I had to go to the Wal-Mart Vision Center today. I was already not thrilled to be going there because a.) I had a mile-long list of other stuff I needed to do today, and b.) I’d already been there twice and couldn’t get someone to understand what I needed/wanted (or I couldn’t articulate it so that they could).

Already not excited to be going there, my less than stellar attitude collided with complete impatience when my friend and partner in rescuing the poor and down-trodden called to say we should meet for lunch. “I can’t…I’m at the Wal-Mart Vision Center”, I explained. Her response was “that’s a pretty darn good thing, cause I’m on my way to Wal-Mart to buy shampoo right now!”

She’s a spontaneous sort of gal…I have a lot to learn about that…so out the window went the to-do list for today, but based on a sermon a few weeks ago, I thought that God would be proud if I could be a little less rigid in the name of authentic relationships.

Little did either of us know what He had planned for us today…

With no one really understanding my needs yet in the vision center I was forced to wait for no reason, but just listen to what God did during that wait time:
**My friend paid for her stuff and came and sat with me.

**We watched a lady, who maybe wasn’t the most fashion-forward, try on some super-cool and ultra-funky glasses…her whole face lit up. Her confidence grew. She knew her cool factor rose about 50 million points in that moment. We both told her she HAD to get them. Then we eavesdropped while the worker told her the price and we prayed (yes, I do mean literally) that she’d be able to buy them. I was prepared to step in if need be. Every person deserves to feel good about herself.

**Everyone in the whole joint looked grumpy…now I wasn’t too thrilled about being there myself at first, but once you’re there you have a choice to make: suck it up and make the best of it, or wallow in it. I choose the first one…AND I’m pretty much going to make you go to that happy place with me…Your light (or darkness) can absolutely change an entire room. (Google “Fish” by Lundin, Paul, & Christensen if you need a little help with that!!) So….friend and I started talking to the people around us, talking a little louder, talking with a little more animation, talking with a little more laughter. And the whole room changed. (This little light of mine…I’m gonna let it shine…)

**As they called me back I thought, “that wait wasn’t so long”…(because I changed!)

**The doctor, a different one than last time, not only listened, but solved my issue quickly (LOVE that!). Upon leaving, smiling broadly, I said, “Thanks so much for really listening to me! I truly felt heard…and that was the kind of customer service I was looking for.” …Compliments are meant to be spoken…

AND here’s the real kicker:

**My friend struck up a conversation with the “Have A Nice Day” lady on the way out (I don’t think you can call her a greeter when she’s at the exit saying goodbye…). Her name is Vera. We've never met this woman, mind you. She was a sweet, darling, little old thing…maybe in her late 70’s. As we spoke with her, really listening…so she would feel heard…we learned that she loved her job at Wal-Mart. She never wanted to quit, but she might have to quit because she can no longer see to drive. She told us that she loved working, and she had just put her dog of fourteen years down and she cried every day about it (talk about speaking straight to my very own heart!). She told us that if she couldn’t come there to work she’d be so lonely and would probably “sit down and die”.

WOW!

You can argue with me six ways from Sunday on whether or not God hangs out at Wal-Mart, but you can never convince me that the two of us were not supposed to talk to this woman.

In the course of our short conversation with her, we’d arranged transportation to and from work starting next week if it turned out that she really did need it. We’d proved someone cares. We’d validated her work ethic. We’d shown her friendship. We’d let her know that age is just a number and that no one has to “sit down and die” if he or she still has the desire to make a difference & spread a little joy! And we’d witnessed about Jesus in Wal-Mart.

Jesus. In Wal-Mart.

WOW!

And we left with tears in our eye, knowing that He orchestrated the whole darn thing for the good of those that love Him, for the opportunity to be presented, to see what we’d do in response, to make available to Vera His hands and feet.

I have many stories like this. I’ve hesitated to share many, believing that my works should be anonymous. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe if we all talked a little more, supported each other a little more in these kinds of efforts, challenged each other a little more, the world would be a different place.

Keep your eyes and ears open…the Veras are everywhere and God is just waiting to see what we'll do!

Question: What can you do today to witness, to be the hands and feet of Jesus, to an unlikely person in an unlikely place?

If You'd Quit Buying Shoes...

2009-08-24T20:49:00.000-07:00

I really do believe that God speaks to people.

And I believe that His words can take on many forms.

His words can be in the form of a message through another person, like a friend giving you the advice or answer you've been searching for when you hadn't even discussed it with that person. His words can be in the form of a verse of scripture that just jumps off the page at you and nearly knocks you out. Or they can come in the form of a voice that you hear in your head that you know is not your own, telling you something important. And His speaking to you can come in the form of a thought, idea, or solution that just pops into your head (and "sounds" like your own voice or however all of your other thoughts sound to your own self), but is something clearly not of your own thinking.

Now, in my saying that you may be thinking, “This chick is crazy!” But guess what? I don’t really care…I’ve heard His unmistakable voice enough times to have any sort of “proof” I might need, and I use that term loosely since the very essence of faith is operating without hard-core evidence that would stand up in court. All I know is this: countless times in my life when I have had a problem, question, dilemma, etc., if I wait long enough and am quiet enough, at some point the answer shows up in one of those ways I spoke of above.

God also speaks to us when we need a little correction.

We all have vices. We all have callings. And sometimes our vices are the very things that stand in the way of us living out our callings.

Coincidence? I think not.

Hmmm. Interesting that maybe God would make it difficult to overcome the very thing that stands in the way of our living out the purpose that He set for us.

Why? I don’t know.

Maybe it’s our way to prove to Him how serious we are about heeding His call.
Maybe it’s so that we can be just that much more dependent on Him.
Maybe it’s so that our own stories of triumph are that much richer.
Maybe it’s to develop our creativity and perseverance as the obstacles that surely will come begin to surface.

The point is that we’ll have to use some serious resolve if we are to give in to God and not to temptation.

The temptations can be many. For you it may unbelief, substance abuse, unfaithfulness in your marriage, taking what isn’t yours (time, money, attention, resources, etc.), but I encourage you to take a long, hard look at what your temptations might be and what God might be trying to communicate to you in regard to them.

My greatest struggle, my recurring sin, is materialism. And when I ease up on the willpower even one tiny bit, my materialism does get in the way of me living out the very purpose He created me for. Now the Bible speaks not of money as evil, but of the LOVE of money as evil. I don’t love money…I just really, really, really like the stuff it buys (some of it actual tangible stuff, some of it conveniences or services)! And I sometimes get caught up in the material world around me – for it constantly rears its ugly head by way of other people, the media, that shmancy mall around the corner…

Luckily, God speaks our language and when I do hear His still, small voice (even though I know it has the capacity to boom like thunder, it seldom does!), He speaks in a way that’s undeniably clear…no King James version, thank goodness!

Out of all of the messages I’ve gotten over the years, this one that came in the form of a clear thought popping into my head, was one of the most timely and compelling:
“If you’d quit buying shoes, you could feed the poor!”

Dang, He’s good! Cut to the chase, man! Bottom-line it! Wow! Cause how do you argue with that?

So, I am working on it. I am making progress. When I fail, I feel the disciplining, but loving hand of God upon me and Him whispering in my ear ever so softly saying, “Someone needs those shoes so much more than you do, girlfriend!” “Who else needs clothing or food today in your community?” “I know you’ve given, but could you sacrifice and give just a little more instead of buying those?” “Aren’t leopard flats and leopard heels enough?? Do you really need leopard wedges, too? Seriously, put that cash in the plate, sister, or the lightning strikes are coming!” “Your legacy is too important…”

Oh, there are all kinds of ways that I justify my materialism, especially my tendency to be a clothes horse. I rationalize it by the fact that I’ve never loved my body, so good clothes take the attention off of me and put it onto the items I’m wearing. I defend it by saying that good clothes make a good first impression. These and the other ways I excuse it are valid…the point is that while looking our best IS taking care of the temple and while we do have to wear clothes, they do not have to be expensive. God is laying it on my heart to find ways to be savvy in my shopping so that I honor him through my finances and by doing the very best I can with what he gave me in looking the best that I can.

So I try not to even go to DSW anymore…therefore eliminating the temptation altogether. I try to buy nothing on impulse, saving cash for it, and only purchasing after having donated to my church and the other things I love to give to first. But daily it is a struggle. Daily I need help. Daily I need prayer. Daily I have to trade instant gratification for the assurance of “Well done, my good and faithful servant”. Sometimes I fail. Sometimes I blow it. But sometimes I get it right, too, and have God to thank and God to praise.

Even though I love to buy stuff, I love to please God even more.

But you can bet your sweet bippy that I’ll be buried in those leopard heels that I already own and paid cash for!

Question: What is God speaking to you about today? What is He trying to tell you?

Insights

2009-08-13T18:32:00.000-07:00

When I began this blog I made one important promise to myself: I will not write/post just to hear myself talk. I will only put something here that I think is important to say. Even if I think only one person on earth will gain something from it, I will only post things that uplift, challenge, comfort people…even make them squirm a little in the name of defining their beliefs about God…but the point of this blog is to help others deepen their faith and tighten their walk with Christ. (…Well, and some funny stuff, too…like hooks and grocery store manners and stuff!)

It’s been a month since I posted anything. If you read my previous post, you are aware that I was struggling that week. Thing is, that was just one week in a roller coaster of what’s really turned out to be a year of some hard lessons, sadness, and disappointment. I kept waiting to get some insights, wanting to come back to put some real “answers” in print. But I kept thinking, “I’ve got nothing to say…”

I certainly don’t have everything figured out, but it’s a few weeks down the road and God has provided me with at least enough calm in the storm to keep me going and a few insights to share.

Just since the last week of April (and MOST of this just during the month of July for Pete’s sake!), all 4 of our parents have had surgeries/health issues, all very concerning and some very involved. After having to put our dog to sleep, I continue to grieve and miss her every minute. Someone dear to us experienced their own loss. We moved my grandmother from her home of 35 years to Assisted Living. I experienced some very difficult things with a couple of work associates, one of which is on-going, has nothing to do with me, but greatly affects me. All of this coupled with several additional smaller disappointments and surprise difficulties during the same time made some days hard to face. And this was just a summer within year of it.

No Debbie Downer here…only illustrating that things haven’t been that great. This way you see that my insights are born out of true suffering and searching… either taught for the first time through all of this junk or I was reminded of them through the experiences.

Here’s what I know to be true:
1. It’s when we’re broken that God is most at work in us.
2. Job did not suffer because he was forgotten. He suffered because he was chosen.
3. Go to the Bible every single time you feel like you need to breathe in a paper bag.
4. I hate cancer! HATE it! God doesn’t “give” it to people, I do know that much. Why some are healed and some are not, I don’t know. What is clear is that we have the opportunity to witness through it, no matter what the outcome is.
5. You have to be still and quiet to hear God’s voice. But when you expect Him to speak to you, wait for Him to, listen for Him to, and eventually He will! If you’re never quiet, you’ll miss it.
6. Worry shows a lack of faith. It takes a lot of self-discipline to re-direct your thinking, but it is a must in living faithfully and God wants to see us do it. You do it by filling your mind with good things like inspirational, spiritual, and motivational books, tapes, etc. I’m not much of a worrier anymore, but during all of our parents’ health issues I found myself slipping back to that. I filled my head with only good things and every time I felt panic coming on, I went straight to the Bible to replace the negative thoughts with the language of faith. Think of it as a meal replacement bar for your head!
7. When people treat you poorly it is often about them, not you. They are acting on years of not trusting others, being hurt, etc. so they have come to expect that from people. The best reaction is to pray for them.
8. I don’t believe that “turn the other cheek” means keep going back for more. This is, in my opinion, a sorely misunderstood Christian concept. I think “turn the other cheek” means to turn away from a toxic person or situation…turning your eyes toward Jesus and His truth. God does not call us to continue to “take it” from those toxic people. Instead he commands that we simply love and forgive.
9. God rewards our faith.
10. We do reap what we sow. But keep in mind that while we plant it, really only God can make it grow. (It's God that provides the sunshine and the rain!)
11. The bible is a living, timely, modern collection of practical advice and commands on how to live well. It is non-fiction at its best! Every answer you need is right there! If you find it hard to read, do two things: 1.) ask God to help you understand it, 2.) buy the version called The Message.
12. There is nothing as satisfying as sacrificial giving.
13. God loves to hear us pray for others. When someone you love is struggling and you pray for them without their knowledge of it, and then they tell you, “Wow! You are not going to believe this but…” and you are able to answer with, “But I prayed for you about that very thing…” there is no purer moment of God at work!
14. Even the Ultimate Type-A Girl can learn to fully surrender to God…and do it with joy!
15. It’s more than just a nice thing to show appreciation. It is a must for the survival of the human heart.
16. Listen to and follow through on it every time you feel God nudging you.
17. When you sacrificially serve through your exhaustion or difficulty or heartache, and “pour out” in the name of God, He will pour back into you and restore you 100-fold.
18. God will gift you to handle whatever challenges and opportunities He places in front of you according to His plan. However, you have to be open to receiving these gifts.
19. God disciplines. This makes you uncomfortable or causes pain in order to get you to stop doing something.
20. God prunes. This is where he cuts away things (or people or activities) in our lives that are no longer needed to make room for things that are bigger, better, and for His Kingdom. Though the process is painful, it is to prepare you for something great.
21. God will reveal secrets to you when you ask Him to.
22. Trust your gut.
23. God promises: “If you seek me, you will find me.” Hold fast to that promise.
24. Prayer absolutely changes things.
25. Trusting God in the hard times, when things are bad, when you are deep in the pit of Hell, is the deepest kind of faith there is! And when He hears you crying out, He will meet you there and scoop you up.
26. Unforgiveness creates bondage.
27. One of the most important things you can do is work on your personal growth – who you are as a person (more than skills, more than knowledge, more than anything). You can only have relationships, finances, opportunities that are worthy of who you are. Life will rise up to meet you where you are every time. If you want more, you must become more. It’s just that simple.
28. Use what you’ve been given and it will grow. Ignore what you’ve been given and it will die.
29. You must find a way to be grateful in every situation. Praising through the worst circumstance is the ultimate sacrifice.
30. God loves to hear from us…when we are praising, singing, happy, confused, questioning, just sitting with him, reflecting, and even crying out in anger! It doesn’t make Him upset when we question and show negative emotion toward Him. He can see that in us anyway, so when we show it outright, but it’s in the context of a deep and loving relationship with Him, it’s us being authentic with Him in that moment, which is what true relationships are built on.
And that’s what He most wants with each of us: true, deep, loving, authentic relationship in which we are dependent on Him to meet our every need, and we believe with every ounce of who we are that He will.

Question: What insights do you have or what insights are you looking for?

What’s the plan here, Dude?

2009-07-11T18:31:00.000-07:00

Dear God,
Since you know the inner-most corners of my heart, I know that you realize that when I ask, “What’s the plan here, Dude?” that I don’t mean it to sound rude. Or flippant. Or mean. Or any of that stuff…it’s just that if I don’t interject a little sarcasm here, I’m gonna fall in a heap and cry. And I realize you know that.

This has been quite the stinky week, Lord, & I just need to vent for a minute. And I love that you’ll let me. Monday was one of the hardest days of my life as we put our beloved dog, my constant companion, to sleep. I know that you felt my sadness, Lord. I felt you grieving right along with me. And we knew we had no other choice if we were to do the selfless, best thing for her. But even though I knew both of those things, it didn’t make my hurt any less.

Later in the week, after having tried my absolute best in a situation, with the purest of intentions to help someone, that person misunderstood my intent and was filled with anger at me and spoke of that anger to me fervently. I forgive her…I realize that she has had a lifetime of hurt, of not being able to trust people, of apparently having to deal with people who had ulterior motives of malice. However, that’s not me, and what an awful experience it was to be on the receiving end of that! Lord, you know my heart, and you know what I was trying to do. Please forgive me for causing that person anguish, but you know the truth in that situation even if no one else does. Thank you for remembering the details some day when I stand before you.

So maybe the week was gonna take a turn for the best…or at least it was gonna end (since it is Saturday & all)…so why did I go check email? Darn it! Why did I? Only to find that something I’ve long been praying about is seemingly turning out with the exact opposite result of my prayers!! Gotta be honest, Lord…I’m angry, frustrated, and disappointed. I am really questioning the people in charge who made this decision…and since you can see the inner-most corners of my heart, you already know that I am questioning why You let this happen, so I might as well admit it. I will try to have an open mind. I will try to believe the best. I will try. But I feel defeated and deflated.

I kinda wanna yell at someone.
I kinda wanna yell at You.

But, I won’t…

I have a lot of questions about this. For starters, “What’s the plan here, Dude”? I know there is one…and I know you’ll reveal it when you’re good & ready. I know that You are always working for the good of those who love you, but I am going on serious blind trust here, Man, cause I am NOT seein’ it!

Somehow I will search for truth in this. Somehow I will emerge from this stinkpot stuff a better, stronger, more tenacious person. Somehow my character will become more defined, my values even stronger. Somehow, even though I don’t want to, I will trust that You have a plan and that it is good, really good. Even if I have to recite the Prayer of Jabez and Jeremiah 29:11 every single day, I will somehow learn to find the good in all of this.

So…
Here I start:

Thank you, God, for teaching me so much this week about how to trust you and your plans for me. Thank you for giving me so many opportunities to lean on you and to grow as a Christian and as a person. Thank you for providing me with many insights about others through the experiences that I have endured this week. You must be preparing me for something important, and I am grateful. Thank you for softening my heart to those who are cruel to me, for they only act out of their previous experience, and I forgive them for that. And finally, thank you for allowing me to question and to be real with you (after all, you see it in me anyway!). Lord, I am yours and you refine me well.
Amen.

(See, even as I type this I am feeling better, more compassionate…and the more I read that, the more I really, really feel it in my heart!)

Ok, I’m gonna be alright, but it’s possible that curling up to an evening of HGTV followed by a little shopping tomorrow would really seal the deal…

Question: Have you ever wondered what the heck the plan was?

Our Reward Is Not On Earth

2009-06-24T20:43:00.000-07:00

It’s almost freaky how over the last several months I’ve had this recurring conversation with people. Each exchange has been due to its own special set of circumstances, and each has involved different people, but the overall theme remains the same.

The over-riding question that has prevailed is this:
Why do things always work out for people who stink? Cheat? Lie? Steal (company time & resources)? Do the wrong thing? Take the shortcuts? Take advantage? Are lazy? Why…yet it always seems to work out so well for them…why?

Why? WHY??? And why then especially when there are those of us out there bustin’ our hineys every day, doing the right thing, working our fingers to the bone, telling the truth, playing by the rules, paying our taxes, helping others, trying to make a real difference, giving to church, going to church, living right and yet we can’t seem to catch a break?

WHY?

The flippant, easy answer is this: Life ain’t fair, sister! So suck it up and deal with it.

But I think we do ourselves, our friends and colleagues, and especially our children, a real disservice when we reduce it to that.

I think the answer lies much deeper than that…I’m willing to bet my every worldly possession that it is because our reward is not on earth. It’s not like I’ve known this or been as sure as I am today about this for my whole life. In fact, it has taken lots of reading of scripture and praying and thinking over the last 39.999999 years to fully grow into it, but I am really, really sure now.

There are plenty of instances in which to contemplate the concept:
(And I don’t mean for these examples to sound judgmental…I’m just sure we’ve all witnessed at least one of these where it wasn’t based on judgment, but on cold, hard fact that this is what was happening.)
Why does the person at work seem to get rewarded over and over even though she doesn’t play by the rules?
Why am I working so hard with such little gain, while I watch her get ahead by cheating and lying?
Why did I do the work, but she got the credit?
Why is she favored when she so blatantly lacks integrity by cheating the company?
…and of course there are the obvious ones…
Why did he die young when he was such a good person?
Why does one neighbor’s family struggle financially when they always do the right thing, but another neighbor’s family has everything they need and more, yet they are so nasty to others?
Why does she, of all people, have to suffer with cancer?

From being passed up for things I worked hard for in school all the way to a very specific instance with a co-worker a couple of weeks ago, this question has come up in my life over and over again. So maybe I write this now as much to remind myself as anyone else…

The only answer I’ve got is that our reward is not on earth. Our reward will be in Heaven. And while the here and now sometimes FEELS like an eternity, it is merely a blip on the screen. But what we do now, during that “blip”, determines where we get to live…with whom we get to live…for what really will be eternity.

I wish I had more…but these are my insights and totally my personal takes on it:
**The phrase “we reap what we sow” has eternal implications!
**Satan likes people who don’t live right, who don’t play by the “rules”, so he makes sure that he sets them up well to live the following lie: there are no negative consequences for your actions. (This helps lure more people to him.)
**God doesn’t actually promise that life will be sweet and rosy because we believe in Him. He promises that with a new life in Christ we will have eternal life and will never be without Him. He promises that eternal life with Him will be paradise and it is worth waiting for.
**God is hoping to see that we’ll hang in there, that we’ll stick with Him, that we’ll believe His promises, no matter what. He wants to see if we are easily dissuaded or if our words (claiming we follow Him) and our actions (actually following Him) match. He wants to see how easily we give up and throw in the towel.
**God is testing our integrity and our worldliness…testing us to see if we’ll “sell out” to instant gratification at some point.
**Adversity can, if we choose to let it, cause us to become better, stronger people. God also hopes we’ll use what we learn from our experiences to help others, especially our children who are looking to us to see why they should remain on the straight and narrow.
**God will reward us greatly in eternity when time after time he sees us choosing the right actions and the right attitudes when we know there is no earthly gain.
**He is keeping a record, a “report card” of sorts, and He will have a student-teacher conference with us about it someday. On that day all justice will be served for the many things we did right…and the many times we fell short of His glory.
**Every single thing…yes, every last little thing, no matter how small it may seem…that you do in His name is adding to YOUR cache of treasure in Heaven.
**God sees all of the works that you do, the true intent behind each one, and the depth of the core of your belief in Him and love for Him.

Luke 6:23 “Rejoice in that day and leap for joy! For indeed your reward is great in
heaven.”
Matthew 16:27 “He will reward each according to his works.”
Matthew 19:21 “You will have treasure in heaven.”
Luke 14:14 “You will be blessed…for you shall be repaid at the resurrection.”

I can often be found saying the following two statements aloud to myself (apparently I need a lot of reminders):
1. The high road is a lonely road, but it is the one I choose to take.
2. My reward is not on earth.

That’s all I’ve got…no other answers…but I’m really sure that I’m right. And I’m really sure that it’ll be worth it.

If you only read one more book in your lifetime, read A Life God Rewards by Bruce Wilkinson. One of the most poignant things he says (and there are many) is this, “Our eternal destination is the consequence of what we believe on earth. Our eternal compensation is the consequence of how we behave on earth.”

Personally, I’d rather “suck it up and deal with it” even though “life ain’t fair”, trusting in God’s every move, choosing the lonely high road over and over again, believing in a wonderful loving Savior, so that I can secure my rightful place at the Feet of the Throne.

Of course when I get there, one of my very first questions to Jesus will be, “Remember X at work (can’t type the names or the situation here…)? What the heck was up with that? Cause, man, did I get the short end of the stick on that one!!”
I sincerely hope He’ll explain and follow up with, “Hey, girl…how you handled that…well done, my good and faithful servant! I knew your heart then and I remember it now, and it contributed to your storehouse of treasure.”

My prayer for all of us:
Dear God, help us stay on the straight and narrow even when it seems like the tougher path. Help us hold fast to Biblical truths, and help us find strength in Christian friends who will encourage us to keep running toward you even when that’s not the easiest or most convenient thing. Give us the stamina we need to cling to you instead of being wooed by the instant gratification of this world. Help us to be patient now so that we may spend a beautiful eternity with you in Heaven. And most importantly, give us the insight and the honesty to use our life experiences to teach our children to do the same. Amen.

Question: Do you believe your reward is in Heaven…I mean really believe?

Alyssa’s Guide to Summer Success

2009-05-28T09:34:00.000-07:00

The following is Alyssa’s list of 15 rules for living a non-embarrassing (yes, I know that’s not a word!) summer so that you still have family who loves you, friends that want to be with you…and yes, your dignity, when it’s over and fall rolls around again!

1. Don't light your grill if you think a raccoon has made it his winter home and is still in there...I'm just sayin'....

2. If your heels look like crumbling concrete, you owe it to society to get a pedicure. Do not wear sandals until you do!

3. Self-tanner can be a delicate thing, so proceed with extreme caution! If your legs come out the color of an orange Crayola, that is the signal that you've gone too far!

4. When choosing between Off and Channel No.5, one must go with the latter.

5. Sunscreen, sunscreen, sunscreen! It is the cheapest, easiest, and most effective key to being a hot chick in the nursing home instead of looking like that lady in There's Something About Mary. Seriously.

6. If you've birthed twins, a one-piece might be a better option than a bikini... (I, of all people, can say this!)

7. Nair doesn’t actually work that well.

8. We no longer call “flip-flops” “thongs”. If you’re not sure why, you’ll have to call me. Not printing it here! Just promise me you won't refer to them that way...

9. When attending a summer soiree, it’s best to sip the umbrella-clad drink slowly and to avoid the potato salad unless it has been on ice.

10. I beg of thee not to wear flesh-colored hose with shorts. N.o.t. g.o.o.d.!!!

11. If you have giant tattoos of past boyfriends’ names, you may want to think twice before wearing that cute little dress with spaghetti straps from Loft!

12. Really only Daisy Duke was born to wear “Daisy Dukes”! (Help me out here, people…)

13. It’s time to get outside and get active when the Lifetime Television movie schedule is cycling back through for a second run.

14. Pluck early and often! Whether they’re jet black or shiny white, chin hairs show up plain as day in the glistening sunlight of baseball games or girlfriend time around the pool!

15. To the list of “Things to Shave”, please do add “the big toes”. Come on now, someone has to say it!

Happy Summer, Friends!

Question: What other rules can YOU think of? Please feel free to leave them as comments!

Reminders of Hope and Promise

2009-05-26T13:53:00.000-07:00

I've been fascinated by rainbows my whole life… From Kermit the Frog singing about the Rainbow Connection, which, I might add, I did a stunning rendition of (OK, maybe not so much!) in the Jefferson School Elementary talent show as a duet with Angie Overdorf & Dee Stahly on keyboard, to my love of Mork’s suspenders. My love of color runs deep.

On the way to school this morning I saw a gorgeous rainbow. Close to my house I could see the left side of it, but as I drove it disappeared for a few minutes. Once I was closer to school, I could see the arch and right side of it. Beautiful! It made me smile and gave me an enormous sense of peace.

Oh, I get the science behind it, and though that's not the point, I love that God thought up that when the sun's rays are refracted through raindrops the white light is separated into Roy G. Biv. How God delights me when He places that little gift in the sky!

And I also love that hundreds and hundreds of years later, God still sends us reminders of His covenant with us through that same way He did Noah:
Genesis 9:16 “Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth."

This morning as I drove (trying to keep my eyes on the road instead of in the sky) I wondered how many people missed it. I'm sure the people heading east couldn't see it. Older guy getting his Indy Star surely missed it...the line of pine trees by his mailbox blocked his view, but would he have seen it even if they hadn't? When I got to school I wondered how many people had grabbed their bags and their lattes and had not even looked up. How many people hurried on their way without looking? How many people were too engrossed in their own stuff to see the reminder?

Kind of a metaphor for life in a few ways, I guess:
1.) God wants us to be positive about life and to see all of the beauty in it! So stop looking down all the time. Keep your chin up, literally and figuratively and look around...it'll be worth it!
2.) There is plenty of evidence that God is alive and working in this world if we will open our eyes and look for Him. He can only do so much to show us...we have to meet Him half way by looking and accepting what He gives as that evidence, but the evidence is everywhere.
3.) Sometimes life feels hard, like trudging through mud, but God had not forgotten us. The politics of the world are scary, but God is watching and holding us close. Cancer, death, divorce…plenty of heavy things happen to people we know and love, but God is there to pick up the pieces. You are not forgotten.

My prayer for all of us: Dear God, help us see the multiple ways you show us evidence of your existence and your power each and every day. Let that evidence stamp out even the smallest doubts that you are working on our behalf. Amen.

When it feels like your own life is the modern-day version of exactly what happened in Genesis 8, “For forty days the flood kept coming on the earth” and “the waters flooded the earth for a hundred and fifty days” I encourage you to look up. When you feel like your “rain” will never end, know that it will. Just hang on a little longer.

God keeps his promises. Will you believe that He does whether or not you see the reminder?

Question: Do you believe that God keeps His promises? Do you believe that rainbows are still a relevant reminder of God’s covenant?

Are We There Yet?

2009-04-13T13:40:00.000-07:00

"Are we there yet?", "Are we there yet?"

It surprised me that the question kept coming despite the fact that my twins are 11 and knew full well that while driving through Alabama on our way home from Florida, we were still states, and hours, away. We had been vacationing in the Florida pan handle, and had gotten to experience that wonderful, white, sugary sand, and sunsets even more beautiful than I remember seeing in Maui.

Living in Indiana, I'm reminded often of how life-giving the crops are that farmers grow here, how we produce materials such as limestone and coal. But living in the non-coastal, flat Midwest, I forget the power of the tide, the roar of the waves, the pull of the undercurrent, how spooky-yet-soothing it sounds at night. Every last bit of it is so gorgeous, so awe-inspiring and it all reminds me of the sheer force of nature.

Some call it Mother Nature.
I call it God, revealing himself through nature.
It’s a tangible way that God makes himself visible and available to us.
It’s a tangible way that He gives us some of His beauty, His creativity, His love for us, His force, His tenacity, His brilliance, if even just a glimpse.

While making the drive home to Indiana, we experienced some severe weather: wind, rain, lightning, hail. We listened anxiously to the radio as we approached the area just south of Nashville and the announcer told of tornadoes having touched down around Murfreesboro, TN. Those tornadoes were the cause of at least three deaths and multiple injuries ranging from minor to severe.

But when we drove through Murfreesboro, just about 2 hours after those tornadoes hit, everything was calm, the sky was blue, and the sun was shining.

It seemed so sad to me that people had just died a little while earlier due to the dramatic power of nature, their families maybe just all being notified by now and certainly still feeling that initial shock and pain, but nature had "moved on" to something so calm and beautiful having left them in its wake.

As Chad drove, I looked at every detail, noticing the signs of the dichotomy we were witnessing. I asked him out loud, "Don't you think it seems ironic, strange, that people just died, died, as a tornado literally tore through here just a little while ago, tore dreams and lives apart, but what we see now is just all of this gorgeous new spring life?" I was pointing to all of the blooms and blossoms.

Chad answered in the poignant way he always does, "I guess it's because life and death are so closely related."

You are so very right, my dear...so very right.

The power of God, displayed in those examples we were seeing in the force of nature, is just a mere drop in the bucket of what God can do. And it struck me as we heard about the lives that ended, that we also saw new life: fresh spring-green grass, new green leaves, calm spa-blue sky with wispy white clouds, gorgeous purple buds on trees ~ all of this beautiful new spring life that we are barely beginning to see farther north in Indiana.

For those of us who believe in Christ Jesus, death is not the end.

Luke 24:The Resurrection
On the first day of the week, very early in the morning, the women took the spices they had prepared and went to the tomb. They found the stone rolled away from the tomb, but when they entered, they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus. While they were wondering about this, suddenly two men in clothes that gleamed like lightning stood beside them. In their fright the women bowed down with their faces to the ground, but the men said to them, "Why do you look for the living among the dead? He is not here; he has risen! Remember how he told you, while he was still with you in Galilee: 'The Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men, be crucified and on the third day be raised again.' Then they remembered his words. When they came back from the tomb, they told all these things to the Eleven and to all the others. It was Mary Magdalene, Joanna, Mary the mother of James, and the others with them who told this to the apostles. But they did not believe the women, because their words seemed to them like nonsense. Peter, however, got up and ran to the tomb. Bending over, he saw the strips of linen lying by themselves, and he went away, wondering to himself what had happened.

Life and death are so closely related. From death springs forth new and abundant life.
We can experience, while being alive in flesh and soul, the death of our old lives, old habits, old ways, old sins, and be born into a new, fresh, free way of existing in close relationship with Jesus here on earth.
And at some point we will die a physical death through old age, disease, an accident… yet our souls will await new bodies, perfected, made whole again, and we will have the joy of living forever on an earth made new with our Lord when He comes again.

1 Corinthians 15:51: Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed.

Luke 20:36: And they can no longer die; for they are like the angels. They are God's children, since they are children of the resurrection.

Revelation 21:4: He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.

Romans 6:2-11: We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? Or don't you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life. If we have been united with him like this in his death, we will certainly also be united with him in his resurrection. For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin because anyone who has died has been freed from sin. Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. For we know that since Christ was raised from the dead, he cannot die again; death no longer has mastery over him. The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God. In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus.

1 John 5:13: I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God so that you may know that you have eternal life.

2 Corinthians 4: 13-18: It is written: "I believed; therefore I have spoken." With that same spirit of faith we also believe and therefore speak, because we know that the one who raised the Lord Jesus from the dead will also raise us with Jesus and present us with you in his presence. All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God. Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

This is what God offers us in His amazing power displayed in the birth, death, resurrection, and ascent of Christ.

Because of Christ's resurrection, our death...yours and mine...is so very closely related to life.

Because of Christ's resurrection, our own personal winter will turn to eternal spring paradise.

Because of Christ's resurrection, our ultimate destination is to dwell with our Lord. It's just that we'll need to wait a little longer till we get the answer to the question, "Are we there yet?"

Just rest in the assurance that one day we will be.
And for all of eternity.

Signals & Signs

2009-03-29T16:00:00.000-07:00

Today while driving on a street near my house, the driver in the car coming toward me was motioning wildly at me. He seemed to be yelling at me when I was doing nothing but minding my own business, enjoying the drive home and singing at the top of my lungs as I am often found doing in the car.

I was taken aback by his actions…almost offended…

Why? I’m not sure.

Maybe it made me think of all of the times that drivers are nasty to each other. And I’ll admit that I’m probably the least like Jesus when driving. Other people’s driving always bothers me. They never do it right. And it tends to bring out the not-so-pleasant side of me. They go too fast, too slow, don’t know the rules for certain situations (not that I do it perfectly, but being a rule-follower, I do know those).

I tell my very spunky, young-acting (and looking) 67 year-old mother that she drives like an old lady (of course, that is simply the truth and sometimes the truth hurts, people!). I tell my beloved and nearly-perfect husband how to drive, and even though I try to keep my mouth shut, I simply can’t (please pray for him!). In fact, we agree that the older we get, the more I’ll need to drive most places that we go together. I think that little arrangement will be the key to keeping our great marriage intact for the long-haul. Sometimes I get so mad when driving that I do talk out loud to other drivers…maybe even yell...just a little... And, yes, I am fully aware of my control-freak tendencies!

I even spoke out loud yesterday as if to answer the guy driving the other car, “What, dude? WHAT? Why are you yelling at me? I’m not doing anything wrong! There is nothing wrong with my car! I didn’t do anything wrong!” And as I remembered that yesterday in that exact same spot on that exact same road another guy did the same thing to me, I said it even louder and with a huge sigh, “WHAT?!?!?!?”

Then a huge smile started to creep across my face.
A warm feeling started to penetrate my heart.
And a little prayer of forgiveness was raised as I told God I was sorry for acting like a fool.
It dawned on me at that moment what was going on:
The driver yesterday and the driver today were both trying to warn me. To warn me. To signal me. To save me. To help me avoid something ahead.
Both days a police car was lurking in a very wooded driveway on that road…waiting to catch someone speeding.

What a nice gesture! How kind! While I wasn’t speeding, being the rule-follower that I am I was glad for the heads-up so that I could be “extra good” at the moment I passed that driveway. (Not that we should try to dodge the police when we are doing something that’s not quite the right thing and are rightfully caught.) It was interesting to me that 2 people, only 24 hours apart in my meeting them on the road, both signaled to me. They didn’t have to do that…if they thought I was going too fast, they might have thought I was about to get my due, but both really wanted to get the message across, to get my attention.

When seeing those gestures, those signals, that communication, I had jumped to the wrong conclusion both times, only later realizing their true intent. What’s even worse is that jumping to conclusions is not my natural tendency. They were trying to help, but I “read” them wrong…

How many times do we do that to God?

How many times does He try in earnest to get our attention, communicate with us, speak to us, yet we misinterpreted it? How often do we jump to the wrong conclusion?

How often do we miss His voice altogether?

There are plenty of Biblical references to asking God for a sign. Gideon, King Ahaz, The servant of Abraham, King Hezekiah, and even Satan ask God for signs. But asking for signs is an act of unbelief that shows God our lack of faith.

I’ll admit that especially in trying to make the bigger life decisions, it’s tempting to ask God to show us a sign that boldly announces which way to go. It’s something that I have to remind myself not to do sometimes, too, as it’s easy to want that reassurance ahead of time.

But here’s the thing: God wants us to step out into faith and TRUST that He will meet us there. The sign that we’ve done the right thing will be His undeniable stamp of approval after we’ve demonstrated that we believe in our heart of hearts that He is real and that we are His. And because we’ve demonstrated it.

He will show us the signs, but not because in a faithless plea we begged Him to. He will show us because with everything that is in us we knew that He would. We don’t need to ask God for signs because when we believe in Him wholly, he will just give them to us as gifts.

He will, just like the drivers I passed, motion wildly if we are on the wrong path. He will speak to us…He HAS spoken to us. It’s just that sometimes we misinterpret it by twisting it into what we want it to be. Sometimes we miss it because we have an attitude. Sometimes we miss it due to something as simple as just not listening, not paying attention.

As much as we might want to ask for a sign, God calls us to walk by faith, not by sight.
And I promise you this: God will show up, and He’ll show up big, if and when we believe that He will.

Question: Are you walking by faith or are you waiting for signs?

That Way for a Reason

2009-03-24T13:00:00.000-07:00

Below is one of my favorite quotes ever:

"To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best day and night to make you like everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight ~ but never stop fighting!" -e.e. cummings

I’ve always felt like I march to the beat of a different drummer…
…I’m a contrarian.
I like to do my own thing, I don’t like to be told what to do (though I’ve never ever been rebellious), I’m certainly my own person, I don’t like to follow the crowd, and I don’t like to be copied.
I’ve always been like that. Always.

Yet I feel that the world is constantly trying to mold me and craft me into what it wants me to be.

You know those hard middle school years…when you feel like a huge dork 100% of the time? I tried just a little bit to fit in then… But trying to fit in was like trying to put a square peg in a round hole, and I quickly realized that it couldn’t be done.

I had to learn to love the things that made me different, even if those things seem strange (or however they seem) to others.
And through learning to love those things about myself over all of these years, I think I’ve also learned to really appreciate the differences in others.

As a society we are quick to want to focus on how we are all alike, and that’s not a bad thing to focus on if that’s what it takes for us to get beyond the small stuff and get to know the heart of someone. But is that really the only way we can embrace each other as humans?

In fact, the world even wants everyone to be alike. Why is that? Why do we try to conform and to get others to as well? Why is peer pressure such a problem? Why do we seek other’s approval so much? Why do we try to impress? Why don’t we passionately, but respectfully argue more? Why don’t we challenge each other to think for ourselves a little more? And when someone blindly states something as truth, why don’t we kindly ask them to back it up with facts? Why don’t I kindly ask them to?

I don’t want to live in a world where we all look the same, act the same, talk the same, think the same.

As a society, why can’t we acknowledge that we are all different, yet “wonderfully made”?
Embrace the differences.
Celebrate the differences.
Enjoy the differences.
Find the good in the differences.
And talk openly and honestly about the differences.

I get the whole “finding the common ground” thing, I guess…
…OK, I guess I don’t get it!!!!
We are supposed to love others just because they are created in the image of God, not because they are like us.
While I’ll admit that is it more fun to be close friends with people who like to do the same things as I do and, those details shouldn’t matter when it comes to treating others well, showing respect, and appreciating them as people who are made by God.

Have you ever felt “not like yourself”? I absolutely adore singing in our church’s worship choir. It is an awesome, God-filled experience every time our voices join together. Oh, how I love it! We have to wear all black when we sing, and I couldn’t agree more with the reasoning behind it. It’s just that in doing so, I feel completely unlike me: colorful, LOTS of jewelry, a little on the eccentric side…yet there I have to blend in, which is something I’m not good at nor like to do.
And in choir I have to totally reign in the whole shoe thing. (Nothing is better than a great, sassy pair of shoes to make that black dress pop! But the plain black is required.)

Maybe you’re a sporty girl (which I have trouble even identifying with), and you live in tennis shoes and adidas pants. When you have to wear a dress and heels, if you even own any, you feel totally unlike yourself and can’t wait to change clothes!
Maybe you’re a little bit country (Marie) and someone else in your life is a little bit rock n’ roll (Donny) and they keep making you listen to their music…and it’s just not you.

You get the idea…

But I want to challenge you to start thinking about it in a new way:
Every cell in my body aches for me to be 100% of who I am…to be true to myself…regardless of how different that is from the next person.
And I believe that God made me like that for a reason.
He made you like you are for a reason, too.

I believe with my whole heart that each of us is put on this earth for a specific purpose. That particular purpose can only be lived out, that very legacy left, if we embrace what makes us uniquely us. We’re not supposed to be like anyone else. We’re supposed to reject conformity and cookie-cutter-ness!

If we try to be something we’re not, aren’t true to ourselves, or ignore what ignites our passion, we are defying God and the very reason he created us.

Song of Solomon 6:9: …my perfect one is unique…

It is our job and responsibility to embrace and develop who we are. To use our God-given talents. To work on ourselves so that we are continually improving. To speak about our obstacles. To go where our heart is truly leading us…for that feeling in our hearts that we can’t ignore is God speaking the calling upon our lives.

And I think it is our job and responsibility to realize that about other people, too.

This week a friend and I talked & emailed about her son, his ADD, and a less than helpful parent-teacher conference. It got me thinking about this very subject. All of us, with all of our hang-ups, all of our quirks, idiosyncrasies, baggage, and experiences are made the way we are for a reason.

It’s what we do with all of it that matters.

What I so badly want is for her son’s teacher to understand that while his ADD is a part of who he is, it is not WHO he is. He is wonderfully made, ADD and all, through a perfect formulation of skills and talents and passions and maybe even some quirks, so that one day he might fulfill the purpose for his life. The very one for which God created him. The one that no one else in the universe can fulfill but him. Her son is the way that he is for a reason. And he needs to be embraced at home, at school, and in society for that perfect combination, whether or not it includes ADD.

I want her son’s teacher to find every wonderful thing in that boy and let my friend know that while there may be some things to work through, she loves him for all of who he is. That is our job as teachers: to value every cell that knits that child together and then to take him as far emotionally, socially, and academically as he can go.

And as a parent, I know from experience what it feels like to have someone (even lots of people) make you feel like the only thing about your child is that “one thing”. What about my kid’s creativity, his problem solving ability, his insightfulness that is way beyond his years, his very dry and sarcastic humor, his leadership ability? Those are the things that really set him apart, that make him march to the beat of his own drummer. Those things matter so much more. And, my kid apparently needs that “one thing” to not only make him authentically who he is, but to live out the whole reason God created him in the first place. He’s that way for a reason.

Psalm 139:13-15 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

Let’s help each other see our differences. Let’s appreciate them, acknowledge them, learn from them.
Let’s prosper and succeed, not in spite of them, but because of them.
Let’s realize that using the ways we are different is the only way we can glorify God in fulfilling His will for our lives.

After all, He’s made each of us unique for a reason and I love knowing that I’m the only me there is!

Question: What makes you YOU? What do you think God’s purpose was in creating you with the exact combination of characteristics that you have?

Grocery Store Etiquette

2009-03-14T20:19:00.000-07:00

Manners 101: Grocery Store Etiquette
How to Behave Like a Decent Human Being in the Grocery Store
An Essay by Alyssa McCool

Hey, I'm no Emily Post or Letitia Baldridge, but I am a 1979 graduate (and I use that term loosely!) of White Gloves and Party Manners! ...My momma made me attend...and much to my dismay at the time, I did learn some very useful social graces that have served me well over the years.

I know how to properly address envelopes whether the couple is married with the same last name, married with different last names, or unmarried. I know how to set the table properly, regardless of the number of courses in the meal. I can handle most social events and know which fork to use, which spoon is for dessert, how to indicate when I am finished eating, walk down the stairs like a lady, answer the phone correctly, even eat an artichoke properly (of course, no one actually needs to know that, but that little detail is highly irrelevant).

Now that's not to say that I do it all correctly all of the time, even though I know HOW to do it. I am, after all, only human (and how much easier life would be if that were not the case!!!). Though I try really hard not to make this particular blunder...I, too, lay invitations aside thinking, "I need to call them about this", only to be horrified as the RSVP date has come and gone and I have neglected to respond. I have occasionally forgotten to call someone back, forgotten a thank you note, or not handled a social situation perfectly. But at least I try!

Oh, it's good stuff, the knowing what to do. "Why", my boys always ask..."Who cares", they want to know. Well, having good manners shows respect for yourself, respect for the people in your presence at the time, and respect for society in general.

But I have decided that there are a few places where a gross lack of etiquette is quite apparent...

... And I have had enough!
... It's time I take a stand!

Maybe I am getting old and bitter, possibly even crotchety...or maybe I am even more type A than I thought (God forbid!)...or maybe I have been the victim of one too many random acts of grocery store rudeness.

Whatever the reason, I simply can't take it anymore!

Forgive me if I sound harsh, it’s just that I feel I must set America straight on the rules of grocery store etiquette!

So let it be heard!... From Marsh to Kroger!... From Super Target to Super Wal-Mart!...
From fresh fruit to frozen food!...
From sea to shining sea!...

These, my fellow Americans, are the rules by which we should shop:

1. The phrase “12 items or less” (which I must point out is grammatically incorrect and should be “12 items or fewer” …oh, I feel so much better) means exactly that. So honey, if you have 13 items, get the heck in the other lane! …maybe that didn’t sound so mannerly or loving…I am so sorry. Please do forgive me. …but still, I do not want to see your face in this line if you have even one item over 12. Play by the rules or don’t play, sister!

2. Please refrain from parking your cart, with your purse in it, in the middle of the aisle, and then walking up and down said aisle looking for items while totally oblivious to the purse-filled cart in the middle. When you do this it leaves me only 2 choices: to stand there pretending to patiently look for something right at the spot where your cart is (while screaming at you inside my head) or to gently move your purse-filled cart over so that I can actually maneuver through the aisle…at which point you, totally oblivious to your rudeness and utter lack of concern for anyone but yourself, think that I am actually trying to steal your purse instead of simply move your car so that I can be on my merry way. NOT a good situation.

3. I beg you to reign in your children. While I adore (most) children, the grocery store can, at times, bring out the little monster in them. And since there are no problems, only opportunities, the grocery store can provide a delightful opportunity to show your child who the boss is…and it is not him! If your little darling starts to act not-so-darling, please do take the proverbial bull by the horns, go to customer service, explain that a mom’s gotta do what a mom’s gotta do, leave your cart with them, and take the child to the car for disciplining. Yes, it is a hassle for you. But, it is the right thing to do, the best thing for your child, and the nicest, most respectful thing you can do for every other customer in the store. (As a side note, the same thing applies in restaurants!)
When my own children have acted like heathens in the store, I have jumped on them like the Lone Ranger on Silver (!) and then smiled broadly, apologized profusely to anyone left in our wake saying, “I’m so very sorry! My boys are still learning grocery store etiquette!” At that point they look at me like I am from another planet, further driving home the point that there is an utter lack of concern for doing the right thing socially. Yet somehow it gives me an odd sense of satisfaction to leave them wondering what exactly just happened.

4. Ah, the cell phone… My nemesis! I do not want to be that accessible! (But that part of this topic is another discussion for another day!) While the cell phone is a useful tool, even necessary at times, it is severely over-used! I get that you may need to call home to check on the teen-ager babysitting your little ones while you are shopping…or you might need to call the friend to ask what that secret ingredient was in her Duck a la Orange (though how thoughtful it would have been of you to have done that prior to leaving home!)…or, if you are a man, how very act-of-true-love-ish for you to call home to ask the wife if she would like her Always with wings or without. However, if a phone call you must make, I beg of you to: A.) make it quick, and B.) make it quiet!! Please do not carry on an hour-long conversation trekking up and down every aisle as you loudly converse about your relationship issues. This is rudeness at its extreme! The other shoppers do not care to hear the details, trust me! Please, just be mindful of your fellow man! …Seriously, people!

5. This one is a biggie…and maybe it comes from my many years of teaching first grade and kindergarten: I like it when people follow the rules, darn it!
And one of them is “Do not cut”!
When the lines get long, and the cashiers open another lane, they should have the good sense to look at the “next in line” point-blank in the eyeballs and say, “Ma’am, I’ll take you over here.”
Unfortunately it usually goes something more like this:
*I am 2nd in line.
*Person checking out in front of me, in the express lane, did not follow rule #1, therefore has 25 items and is counting out exact change to the penny, and trying to give multiple coupons, some of which have expired.
*Line gets long behind me.
*New line opens.
*12 year old girl working newly opened register doesn’t even look up as she yells, “Next!”
*While truly I am next, the 7 people in line behind me start running like maniacs who have never been in public, elbowing each other out of the way.
*Of course, in my quest for civility, I did not join in the maniacal clobbering to get to the other line, so there I stand…stunned…and most notably, still waiting behind 25 item person!!

(Here’s a hint about what’s supposed to happen if check out girl doesn’t take charge and tell everyone who is coming over next: The person behind person #2 in line says with a smile, “Hey, you’re next, so how about you go first and I’ll follow you over to that line?” See how civil that is…delightful!)

This very scenario recently happened to me at my local grocery…except that it was exacerbated by the fact that I was in the biggest of big hurries and more than one lane opened and, while I was #2 in line, no one made any attempt to disperse the line in the order in which it was formed. (The control freak in me just about went off the freakin’ edge cause all we needed here was some sensible person to take charge and start directing people…I think I would have been a good choice….I would’ve done it with a sweet voice and a lovely smile!) The chick in front of me was not only counting out coupons and correct change, she was also having an in-depth conversation with the clerk about something (truly) meaningless. I had no paper bag to breathe into, so while practicing my deep cleansing breaths and positive self-talk, trying to embody what it is that Jesus would do, and not stab this chick in the eye with my leopard-print stiletto, I decided that I must become the voice of store etiquette and write about it!

And finally…
6. After placing your bagged groceries in the back end of your car, please do take the extra 30 seconds to place your cart in the receptacle. For the love of Pete, people, it takes all of 30 seconds! This alleviates the wind blowing your cart into my headlights while I am shopping! Putting it “away where it goes” allows the elderly lady to pull into that choice parking spot that she actually needs. And it just shows respect for the store property, it shows respect for the property of others, namely their expensive cars that they don’t want scratched, and it’s just the right thing to do! Frankly, folks, it’s just good manners!

So, at the risk of sounding however I just sounded, I am glad I’ve aired my grocery grievances…
Maybe you’ll think of what I’ve said…
Maybe you’ll copy this blog and “accidentally” drop it at the feet of some rude dude in the store to teach him a lesson…
Whatever the outcome, I feel better, vindicated even, just having said it!

But know this…
I’ll be watching you…like a good store security camera…I’ll be watching.

Question: What's the worst etiquette you've encountered in a store? What's something you could do sometime to show manners and respect to others?

What Is Love?

2009-02-14T09:00:00.000-08:00

My husband’s grandfather passed away several years ago, but that man was one huge character! He was a big tease and when Chad and I were dating, he was relentless! Every time we visited Chad’s grandparents I knew the question was coming:

“What IS luuvvvv?”

He drew out the word love, almost adding a little southern drawl to it…and then looked us point blank in the eye. Waiting. Waiting, apparently, for our brilliant answer. Which we never quite had.

It's not that I didn’t know it, at least in part back then. It’s just that I couldn’t quite articulate it at age 17 as Pete (as we called him) was sitting still as a statue, boring a hole in me with his stare, smiling broadly, eyes dancing, full of fire and mischief that you wouldn’t expect from someone Pete’s age.

But after dating Chad for 6 years and being married to him for 16 and a half more, I think it is time to formally answer that question.

So Pete, here goes… “What IS luuvv?”…

Love is how Chad starts my car in the morning so it will be warm.
Love is calling me from Target to see if I want the maxi’s with or without wings. I mean, seriously…that is love!
Love is eating what I cook, no matter how interesting it is.
Love is trying to understand each other’s sensitivities…and trying to avoid saying things that will twist the knife in the heart.
Love is giving each other space when needed.
Love is being together when desired.
And love is knowing the difference.
Love is supporting each other’s dreams without judgment.
Love is believing in each other’s goals and ideas, and not thinking they’re crazy… no matter how crazy!
Love is comforting me when I am having a melt down about piles of laundry and piles of mail and piles of dog hair…all on a “fat day”.
Love is feeling protected, safe, and cared for.
Love is being listened to and understood.
Love is laughing together…
…And sometimes, gently, helping me laugh at myself. Gently.
Love is forgiving and forgetting.
Love is upholding the vow.
Upholding it during the good, the bad, the beautiful and the ugly. Knowing that the vow is so rock solid that you can safely be 100% of who you are…safely pour your heart out.
Love is putting each other first. Even when it’s not easy. When it’s not convenient. When it’s not fun.
Love is being aware when one of us needs the pep-talk, but also knowing when one of us needs to just wallow in it. And holding each other regardless.
Love is accepting each other’s faults.
Love is celebrating each other’s brilliance.
Love is recognizing the uniqueness that we each bring to the relationship.
Love is deciding over and over again to move forward on the path of life together.
Love is being able to trust because he always does what he says and says what he does.
Love is watching the children that we’ve created together grow.
Love is appreciating each other and not taking each other for granted….ever.

If you think of snippy little comments as small flames, love is how Chad “throws water” on those flames whenever I’m snippy by being nice in return, instead of seeing my snippy-ness and raising me one to fan those flames into a full-blown fire! (That’s one of the biggest secrets to our marriage, I think! We are masters at defusing.)

And love is knowing that out of everyone on earth…all these years later…I still choose him because of the man that he is.

I still choose him.

And I thank God for that love.

Question: How would you answer Pete’s question, “What IS luuvv?”

Fear

2009-02-03T16:04:00.000-08:00

I have noticed lately that a lot of people seem to be running with fear.

Fear about the economy. Fear about their jobs. Fear about their bank accounts, their children’s choices, their relationships…

Even the weather (while it is a snowy, cold mess) seems to strike more fear in people’s hearts than it normally would due to people’s heightened emotions.

There is a blanket of fear covering this world like a dark and heavy mass. And that fear seems to be penetrating into the very core of people’s lives. It’s a fear that is occupying their thoughts and holding them back from even the simplest activities and commitments.

And I have a feeling that God is sad about it.

Yes, there is certainly some roughness in the world right now. But if we give into it, then we lose. God loses.

However, if we stand up in faith, we win and God wins.

I invite you to step out in faith with me…just for a minute…and dream of a world without fear.

Might it look like this?

If I have no fear about my own financial situation, trusting God to provide, then I will dig into my pockets and give to my fellow hurting man.

If I have no fear about the economy, believing that God has it all under control, I will go ahead and buy what it is that I can afford and continue to stimulate the economy in my own small way.

If I have no fear about my own gifts and talents, trusting God to bless me as I use what He has given me, then I might find that now is the perfect time to try something new that I’ve always wanted to do (start a new business, sell my craft items, write that book I’ve always dreamed of, start a not-for-profit that really works hard to serve others).

If I have no fear in my relationships, I will listen to God as He nudges me and I will act on those urges to encourage and uplift someone else that I sense is hurting.

If I have no fear, always trusting that God is leading me, I will follow the tug of God. I will listen to God and answer back with the action that He hopes for. I will be open to stepping onto the path that He has laid for me. I will search out His will and follow it. I will not need to be afraid because I will know that He is carrying me, holding me, wrapped around me…sometimes with a light touch, and sometimes with a tight bear-hug-of-a-squeeze, but always there waiting for me and with me. Always.

God doesn’t want us to be afraid. He doesn’t want us to back away or to back down from the path that He is pushing us toward simply because we are scared. He wants us to take the risk and to trust Him through it.

Isaiah 43:1-3
But now, this is what the LORD says—
he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the LORD, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.

Consider your God-given purpose…do you know what it is? If not, I challenge you to really spend some time reflecting deeply about it in prayer. God has gifted you so that there is something specific that only you can do.

It could be something completely enormous and world-changing in one split second. Or it could be something more like mine: something simpler, recurring, not nearly as earth-shaking on the surface, but equally important.

But what if, because of all of the fear in the world right now, you start to buy in to being scared and you fail to live out that purpose.

You are letting yourself down.
More importantly, though, you are letting your God down.

What is standing in the way of you starting to live out your purpose right here, right now? What is holding you back?

Is it fear? Don't let fear hold you back! (Or busyness, or complacency, or doubt.)

When you run toward fear, what are you running from?

Helping others? Giving to church and charity? Using your talents, gifts, creativity? Lifting your voice? Living the dream that God placed in your heart? Living out the purpose that you were created for? Wow...What does that say to God?

Think about it....then decide that on your last day on this earth you won't say,
"I let fear get in the way of all I could have done and all I could have been".

Your greater purpose is waiting on you to stop being afraid!

Question: Are you living out your God-given purpose? Are you afraid? Of what? Why?

Salmon

2009-01-27T14:08:00.000-08:00

Oh, how I love salmon. All grilled and seasoned, perfectly flaky inside with crispy edges. Served on a bed of rice with a slice of lemon. Prepared by some God-inspired chef, like Keltie. In fact, salmon is my third favorite food, right after cookie dough and crab legs. Oh, those three…like the holy trinity of dining! And when I eat salmon, I feel all healthy…you know, Omega 3’s and Vitamin D…good for the heart!

Salmon are fascinating creatures. They migrate, go away from home to “grow up”, then return to have their babies…coming home, in a way, like a prodigal son. They are adaptable to freshwater and saltwater, spending parts of their lives in both. 137 species of animals depend on salmon for food. Everything from wolves to bears prey on them.

Sometimes I feel like a salmon…

…A salmon swimming upstream, going against the current. Trying to stay all pure (not like the farmed salmon that aren’t so good for you to eat). Feeling like I’m getting preyed upon by a ferocious world. Hoping that I "feed" others with something that's good. Trying to be all bright and beautiful in a sea of grey and pessimism.

Today I was having trouble being where I wanted to be mentally. That’s not a problem I usually have because in “Alyssa Land” things are usually all rosy (or salmon-colored!), and good.

But today, not so much.

Maybe it’s that I haven’t really seen the sun for weeks. Maybe it’s that I need to deep-clean my house & I just don’t wanna. Maybe it’s those darn “holiday pounds” that I can’t shake (the cookies seemed worth it at the time). Maybe it’s that winter gray just isn’t my color. Or maybe it’s that lately I’ve had an extra dose of “these people just don’t get me”.

Whatever the reason I am fully in my January Funk.

It happens every year…39 years in a row now, so I shouldn’t be surprised. But on top of the January Funk, today I felt a little misunderstood. And as I looked around, I said to myself, “I feel like a salmon swimming up-stream!” Then I had to chuckle to myself… Of course I feel like that!

Maybe God even wants me to feel that way: constantly going against the current. Constantly feeling not-of-this-world, like I don’t belong. While I try to be adaptable, like a good salmon would be, I frequently feel misplaced…like I have migrated away into unknown waters, fighting to be a little piece of God’s light in a world so far away from Him that I’m not surely if he’s still recognizable.

In a strange way I think God calls us to be salmon, though it is hard to be constantly swimming against the current of a world running from Him, a world running to the things of popular culture and celebrity gossip and scandal. Sometimes that feels really lonely.

I think He calls us to be pure, like a salmon born and bred in God-made oceans and streams…away from the contamination of a salmon farm. Sometimes that feels really hard.

I think He calls us to swim fast, trying at every turn to escape the earthly things that prey on us. To navigate those hard moments by the instincts that He placed in us, to act on what we always knew was the right thing anyway. Sometimes that is really isolating.

But doing the things that make us feel lonely, that are hard, that isolate us from popular culture are sacrifices that are pleasing to God. Sacrifices made in His name bring joy to the very heart of God.

He wants us to be the salmon, and the only influences that pierce our hearts, His.

Romans 12:1-3: Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you.

My prayer for you, and for myself, is that we will continue to swim upstream, no matter how hard, in an attempt to please our Father in Heaven.

My prayer is that we will all find ourselves navigating this life with other believers, so that the lonely and isolated moments feel few and far between.

And my prayer is that we will never look at another plate of salmon in quite the same way, but that we’ll use it as a reminder that we need to forever nourish the body, mind, and soul with good things, pure things, healthful things, things that prepare us for an eternity in heaven.

So keep swimmin’ upstream, girls! I’ll be right there with you!

Question: When was the last time you felt like you were swimming upstream? Why? What was the result?

Good Mom

2009-01-25T15:53:00.000-08:00

One day recently we had a snow day. Well, actually it was a “bitter cold, sub-zero temp” day, but you get the idea.

I was psyched! Not only was it a day off of school for the boys, but for me as well. I had a to-do list a mile long and this day was like a freebie…a gift, given in the spoken name of “bitter cold”, but surely it was secretly straight to me from God in the name of “too much to do and not enough time to get it done”!

My list, as I mentioned, was l..oo..nnn…gggg…..
(and, I might add, unrealistic!)

It went something like this:
1. return calls
2. return emails
3. do laundry
4. take down the outside (dead!) greenery
5. straighten house
6. get cards ready to mail
7. organize office
8. go to Target
9. go to Post Office
10. go to grocery

But do you know what? I didn’t do a darn thing on that list that day! Not one last thing!

Instead I slept in (a gift straight from heaven!). And when I did wake up, I dozed off and on for an hour and a half while one of my boys snuggled next to me, playing his DS, and giving his commentary on the news as it aired. See, the boys are getting older and the days of snuggling are fleeting I know. When we finally did get our lazy hineys out of the bed, we lounged in our jammies, made a leisurely breakfast, watched 2 movies on TV, folded laundry (the little bit I could muster the energy to do) while we laughed and basically piddled the day away.

The truth is that I put my list second to my children by conscience choice. I am trying to strike what I consider a happy balance between my children thinking that they (and their dad) are the most important things in my life and realizing that the world does not revolve around them. This is quite a delicate balance to achieve! But now and then I want them to see that I dropped everything just to be with them, enjoying their company, and I hope they will look back on it twenty years from now with really fond memories.

While I do know that time is a gift from God, not to be squandered, I don’t view that that’s what I did on the day in question.

I see it like this: I got nothing done that the world would judge as productive. (Sorry Stephen Covey...no "first things first") In the world’s view maybe I didn’t spend my time well, but I know that I did invest my time well. And I invested it with such a high rate of return that it would send Wall Street guys runnin’! (So maybe it was "first things first" after all!)

So while I can cross nothing off of my list that was an errand or a household chore, I think I’ll add: #11. Good Mom… just so I can cross it off!

1. return calls
2. return emails
3. do laundry
4. take down the outside (dead!) greenery
5. straighten house
6. get cards ready to mail
7. organize office
8. go to Target
9. go to Post Office
10.go to grocery
11. be a good mom

Question: When have you dropped everything for the sake of your kids? How did it make you, and them, feel?

When Your Best is Total Crap

2009-01-18T16:34:00.000-08:00

Let me begin by saying I am sorry for using the word crap. I rarely, rarely cuss…though I would be a big fat liar if I said I had never let one slip as I slammed on the brakes, hard, in heavy traffic on 465! But I do use those “in-between words” like “crap” because sometimes they are just the right way to describe something that no other word (crud, stink, etc.) quite does. So sorry if it offends, but not sorry enough to find another word! You will just have to suffer through in the name of literary art! (Please do pick up on the sarcasm.)

That said, let’s get to the heart of this blog entry: sometimes my best is total crap!

I despise mediocrity. It is my antithesis. It goes against everything I stand for. I think if you are not going to give your very best, forget it. Too many people make empty, half-hearted promises; they give no effort, have no perseverance, and have no follow-through. Of that I am not a fan! I say, show up and show up big…

In fact, our family motto is “Go big or go home”. For us it means that in everything you do, give it your all, do it all the way, 100% effort, under-promise and over-deliver every time. This doesn’t mean that we have to be perfect, but that we TRY, in all things, to give the very best that we have.

However, sometimes it backfires, blows up, falls apart, and in true “Go big or go home” style, when it does it backfires big!

Sometimes my best, all I have to give, is awe-inspiring; something I know is beyond my own ability, something really great, something truly lifted by the hand of God.

And sometimes, my best…the best I’ve got, the very best I can do, is utter, complete, total and 100% crap!

I tell you this so that I can tell the “world” (aka the 2 people who read this blog), that even when things turn out yucky, I still tried...really hard.

I tell you this so that when my children are grown and might look back on this, they would know that so many times I meant to do better than I actually did.

And I tell you this so that when your best completely falls apart, you will release the guilt, the expectations, the whatever-it-is-that-you-made-it-into, and know that your trying still counts (and that I would give you an A+ for effort!).

This “crap” thing happens to me all the time. It really makes me wonder what kind of mess I would be in if I didn’t despise mediocrity! Can you even imagine? Yikes!

It happens when I try to cook after too many sports-filled nights of having dinner wrapped in paper and handed through a window. The dinner I cook doesn’t “suit” my boys’ tastes, it doesn’t look good to me, Hubby wants to like it…he really tries. This happens all the time. Recently the first-born of the twins said, “Mom, maybe you should just give up cooking and we should eat at Wendy’s every night.” I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

In my business I strive to provide outstanding customer service, but sometimes…more often than I would like to admit…I make mistakes. I always “right” the “wrongs”…always. But with that comes, every time, a price of money or time or both. There is always an “expense” to me in fixing it, but it is the right thing to do and how I would want to be treated.

Sometimes at school I plan some wonderful thing, and while it turns out to still be valuable for teaching the concept, it’s nothing like how the movie played out in my mind.

Many times I unintentionally let people down, which is in my list of Top 5 Things I Never Want to Do to People. Sometimes it is due to circumstances beyond my control, like the other day when a snowball (literally, kind of!) effect caused me to be unable to keep a commitment to a friend. Sometimes it is my own doing…not because I wanted to, but because I over-committed, I didn’t think through the calendar, or I just plain (as horrifying as it is) forgot!

The point is, I mean to give 100% every stinkin’ time…yet over and over my very best attempts register as more like 4%.

I guess the lesson is that no matter how hard we try, there are times when we all will:
let people down
be misunderstood
do things wrong
make mistakes
mess up royally
not be heard
make someone mad
hurt someone’s feelings, and more…
…and all of it when we were trying to do the right thing!

Romans 9:15-17: For he says to Moses, "I will have mercy on whom I have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I have compassion." It does not, therefore, depend on man's desire or effort, but on God's mercy. For the Scripture says to Pharaoh: "I raised you up for this very purpose, that I might display my power in you and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth."

See, the “crap” reminds me that I can’t do anything without God. I can’t make anything work without Him, and I know it, but He is glad to remind me and I don’t want to forget.

God turns the crap into roses...like Crystal Lewis sings about in Beauty for Ashes. He takes what we mess up daily and makes it beautiful again. And the daily stuff of life is the constant reminder to us that we are supposed to lean on Him. Jesus wants us to lie at His feet asking for our ashes to be made beautiful. He wants us to need Him over and over and over again.

Galatians 3:3 Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?

Job 36:19 Would your wealth or even all your mighty efforts sustain you so you would not be in distress?

May we all find miraculous, unyielding glory in our biggest mistakes, our grandest failures, our most severe disappointments. May God teach us humility and reliance on Him. And most importantly, may we relish in the times that things do go the way we plan and give God the credit for each and every little thing that goes right in our lives and in the world.

Question: When have you tried to give your best, but it all fell apart? What was the lesson for you in that moment?

The All-important 1st Runner-Up

2009-01-15T20:12:00.000-08:00

I have a confession to make.

I have been in pageants.

OK…I said it!

I was not in them for the “glamour” (glamour being a relative term), but for the scholarship money. So my focus really was on pageants such as Junior Miss and those that were the preliminaries to Miss America (Miss Elwood, Miss Ball State…hoping to get to Miss Indiana), which had great scholarship pay-outs as prizes.

Some of the “merits” of the pageant circuit, besides the blingy crown (….and don’t you go rolling your eyes…you know you always wanted one…just put the moose on the table, girlfriend!) were friendship, panel interviewing skills, poise, & talent development.

But wait…
There’s more!
The untold merits of the pageant circuit:
Nasty girl-fights (entertainment for those of us who find that kind of behavior utterly ridiculous!), cans of Aqua Net for solidifying the big hair (it was the late 80’s/early 90’s, after all), working with a Pageant Coach, a box of gleaming trophies that you've moved from house to house in adulthood...secretly considering an Oscar-like display on the mantle, dyed-to-match 3-inch heals to go with your one-piece, and spray adhesive to glue the buns of your one-piece down.

I learned some very important lessons from pageant participation.

However, I never was “The Queen”.

I was the all-important first-runner up in the event that the Queen could not fulfill her duties…
…except that never once was she not able to fulfill her duties.

(No pageant queen in history has ever not been able to fulfill her duties, I think. Well, except for Vanessa Williams, but let’s not go there!)

Interestingly, this has kind of been a theme throughout my life, this first-runner up thing.

Over and over I have had instances where I was good, but not good enough. Talented but not talented enough, funny but not funny enough, smart but not smart enough. I can think of countless examples, and many times that I was “just” passed over. For years it almost plagued me. Even today there is month after month where I am a high achiever, but not high enough.

After years of feeling like I am good at lots of things, but not the best at anything I was highly frustrated. Then one day it dawned on me and the first part of that sentence stuck and the last part kind of just faded away.

I am good at lots of things.

No, I am not “the best” at anything. I can think of tons of people that are better at every single aspect of life and all that is in it than I am…how humbling. But God, for some reason, made me at least decent at lots of stuff…how humbling that is, too…that He would allow me those gifts, even if my gifts seem sometimes much less gifted than the next girl’s.

Ya know what? I am not the 1st Runner-up in my husband’s eyes…I am his Queen, stretch marks and all…might not want to be caught dead even in a one-piece though, let alone the dyed-to match heels!

And ya know what else? I am not a 1st Runner-up in God’s eyes. I am His Queen, and so are you. There is room at the throne, His throne, for all of us. He doesn’t have to crown just one of us. There are Crown Jewels enough for all of us, there is Royal Inheritance for all of us. And our reward for following Him? A full-ride to the U of E (University of Eternity)…I’d rather have that kind of “scholarship” anyway!

And so now, so much older and more mature am I, it is OK to not be the Queen in the world’s view because I am the Queen in a way that really matters and so are you.
“Yet what is due me is in the Lord’s hand, and my reward is with my God." Isaiah 49:4
I am a Queen with two kings…my Earthly King, my husband…and my Heavenly King, my God. And I will always have a place of prominence in both of their kingdoms, this is the free gift they both give to me. And God has that free gift to give to you too, if you choose to accept it.

And anyway, my mother was right. She, being ever the spin-doctor, always told me that being a little good at a lot of stuff meant I was well-rounded. I like being well rounded. Besides, being a little good at a lot of stuff means that I can craft my own crown, grow and beautifully arrange my own victory bouquet, design my own gown (though I will have to pay someone else to sew it), write my own song for the talent portion, draw on my knowledge of current events to prep for the interview, do my own hair and make-up, and be nice enough to win Miss Congeniality to boot!

OK, well…gotta run. I heard the downloadable application for the preliminary to Mrs. America is now available on-line…

Question: When in your own life have you felt like the 1st Runner-up, like you just aren’t quite good enough? What has God taught you through that?

I've Had an Epiphany!

2009-01-05T19:48:00.000-08:00

I’ve had an epiphany!

And it’s about Epiphany…

People are in an awful big rush to get to Christmas (decorated trees in Target before Halloween!), and people seem in an even bigger hurry to get it over with.

Now, if you’re one of those “in a rush to get it over with” people, please don’t take this the wrong way…just consider it food for thought.

(I’ve always gone against the grain on things, and this is just another example!)

Just like there are seasons in our calendar and seasonal change in nature, there are seasons in the Christian calendar. One of these seasons is Epiphany, and my epiphany about it is that not too many people know what it is, lest they wouldn’t be rushing me to pack up the tree, take down the lights, haul the greenery to the curb & move on!

See, I’ve known all along that I had justification in the Christian calendar for wanting to enjoy it, soak it all in, relish in it…but only now did it occur to me that maybe I was supposed to communicate that to the rest of the world… that it’s OK to still be celebrating Christmas on January the 5th, fully decorated house and all.

Come sit by the manger
Come bathe in the light
Come rest in the Savior
Drink in renewed life

Take a minute, enjoy His birth, unwrap & accept the Gift, snuggle your family, spend some time, just slow down after the pre-December 25th rush…

In fact, that’s exactly what we are supposed to do!

Take time to soak it up, then fill yourself with the light of the newborn King, and share it with all whom you come in contact.

The season of Advent begins four Sundays before Christmas Day.

Christmas begins with Christmas Day on Dec. 25th, but it lasts for 12 days and ends on January 5th. This period of time is known as the 12 days of Christmas, and is sometimes called Christmastide.

(Ahhh…You gettin’ it now? The 12 days of Christmas...My true love gave to me… Could your true love be Christ? What has He given you? What has come to us because of Him? I challenge you to rethink that song: 3 gifts from Magi, 2 humble parents, and a baptism in the Jordon River!)

Epiphany begins on January 6th and is the celebration of the Star of Bethlehem, the Gifts of the Magi, the childhood of Christ, the baptism of Christ, the Manifestation of Christ to the Gentiles. Epiphany lasts from January 6th till the eve of Ash Wednesday, when the season of Lent begins.

So see, Christmas isn’t officially over, at least as far as the Christian calendar goes, until the night of January 5th. (I guess now I really will have to come to grips with the fact that is a done deal until next Advent!)

If your tree is already put away, it’s all good. But if you are like me, and you are just now getting to find the calm and restoration in it, know that you are not alone.
You are completely justified (if you need that sort of thing) in joining me in being THE LAST girl on the block to the take down the tree, unplug the lights, and un-hang the stockings. It is OK to slow down, take time, and go against the grain. And in fact, we should.

I celebrate with you and I encourage you to embrace the manifestation of Christ, to look for your own epiphany in Epiphany, and to carry His light into a world that so desperately needs it.

Question: Are you glad when Christmas is over or are you always sorry to see it end? Why do you think that’s so?

15 Lessons

2008-12-31T21:19:00.001-08:00

To say I don’t much like New Year’s Eve would be a gross understatement.

I’m not really sure why…

Maybe it’s that I’m so sentimental and have a hard time letting go. And the harder I grasp at those last fleeting moments of the year, the faster they slip away. Like the way a mother grips her toddler’s finger to hold him close, yet eventually she has to release him as she can’t hold on forever.

Maybe it’s the security of knowing. And while the New Year holds loads of promise, it is also unknown territory.

Maybe it’s that “packing for camp” feeling that I got every dang time I left home…homesick even before I left…for a destination I was excited about.

Maybe it’s that I hold the old year in my arms like it is old friend or relative…not wanting it to leave. Because even with all of its faults, it is the good that I always focus on.

I am tonight, as I am every single year, melancholy once again as that darn ball gets ready to drop.

2008 was an interesting year. It held some huge blessings and some monumental disappointments. And with the good and the bad came a multitude of life lessons:

1. Sometimes my very best is total and 100% stink. (This will be a future blog topic all on its own!).

2. I’m too old to care what people think. I never want to be inappropriate or offensive, but with me what you see is what you get, and if you don’t like me it is really OK.

3. Humility is a wonderful lesson to learn. It is an amazing thing to realize that you are as insignificant as a grain of sand, and yet that you have a purpose in this life that no one can carry out but you.

4. A contrarian am I. I always have been and always will be.

5. That crazy God! …He’s still got plenty of tricks up his sleeve on my behalf. (And on your behalf, too!)

6. No matter what I do for others it is never enough. But I don’t mean that in an “I-can’t-ever-do-enough-poor-me” kind of way. I mean it in a “let’s-see-if-I-can-out-do-myself-cause-what-I’ve-already-done-was-a-great-attempt-but-let’s-ramp-it-up” kind of way.

7. Listen to the gut!

8. It is really important that you sink in! Changing churches & becoming part of Grace was the best thing I have done for my personal spiritual growth in a long, long time. (No “thanks” can ever express it, Lisa!) We actually started going in ‘07, but we didn’t “sink in” till ’08, & the sinking in is where it's at!

9. It is more important than ever to make time for the people in your life. But it is also OK to let go of some people, too.

10. I really love having and writing a blog! I have a lot to say…and it is very possible that it is stuff that no one actually wants to hear. But if it helps one person fall into deeper relationship with Christ, or gives one person the opportunity to read quietly at midnight because she is too scared to ask aloud, the purpose has been served.

11. I’ve squelched my creativity for a few years…because I was busy…but I have to realize that the creativity and other talents that I have were specifically given to me for a reason, and I have to use them in order for them to be increased. This is non-negotiable & I have seen proof of this over and over in my life this year. This is true for all of us, so if this resonates with you, take heed.

12. Not only must I use the gifts I have been given, but I am required to use them at the place where I already am if I want them to grow.

13. I seek and appreciate truth more than I ever have before.

14. Slow & steady wins the race and you must build on fertile ground.

15. If you ask for truth, understanding, and wisdom, pursuing God relentlessly, He will reveal it to you. But in His time and through His ways.

In about ten minutes it will be 2009. I will probably feel like crying as that old friend, 2008, slips out the door and it softly closes behind him. Instead of crying, I will try to focus on the gratitude I feel for baseball games, for family gatherings, for my church and my spot on the risers in the choir, for new friends & old, for birthday parties, and for leopard print shoes.

I will focus on gratitude for a God who continually delights and challenges me, who never gives up on me ~ or you ~ and is always waiting on us to want Him by our side. A God who made us to be like Him, knowing that we never can be, but is so very proud of us for trying.

May you be richly blessed in 2009, and may it teach you a multitude of wonderful lessons as it settles in to become your new and dear friend.

Question: What did 2008 teach you?

Got Joy?

2008-12-27T19:05:00.000-08:00

Got joy?

I do!

…Way down deep!

It overpowers everything, every other emotion that I have.

And because of it I have to use a lot of wrinkle crème! I have the potential for lots and lots of laugh lines and crows feet...because I smile constantly!

Do you remember this old Bible School song:
I’ve got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart.
Where?
Down in my heart to stay.

That’s why I smile all of the time!

Joy is my over-riding emotion… In fact, it overflows and I like it that way. It’s a good place to dwell, and I can’t keep from smiling! Sometimes my face actually hurts from smiling so much! My joy wells up, bubbles over, oozes out.

And I’ve been this way for quite a while, though I just really realized it not too long ago.

I’ve realized that I have joy when I am happy, joy when I am glad, joy when I am excited.

You may be saying, “Big whoop, lady! I don’t get the big deal, aren’t you supposed to be joyful when you are happy?”

Well, you’d be surprised!

I’ve known a lot of people who were happy about a particular circumstance, but deep down they were depressed, or angry, or disillusioned, or had a chip on their shoulder. I’ve known a lot of people who were all kinds of positive emotions, but those emotions were tied to a particular person or event in their life, and when things weren’t going well with the person, or when the event or circumstance came to an end, the bitterness welled up and overflowed.

See, I am also filled with joy, joyfulness, joy overflowing when I am upset, irritated, exhausted, sad, mourning, confused, and just down-right ticked-off.

And because of JOY, even when I feel those negative things, they don’t last long and they don’t run nearly as deep as they would otherwise ~ I’m just sure of it!

From where does my joy come? My joy comes from the Lord. (My take on Psalm 121:1…it actually says “help”, but I really like how it reads with the word joy subbed in!)

I guess I really realized all of this a few months ago after something kind of big didn’t go my way and I was pretty down about it, yet at the same time I felt an overwhelming sense of joy. In that moment it dawned on me: that is what the old Bible School song is about. It’s one of those simple little childhood melodies that we sing without thinking about the true and deeper meaning.

But HOW, you may be wondering, just exactly does one acquire this joy of which I speak?

Three ways, I believe:
1.) Continually praising, even through the crud.
This very well may involve asking God for help, and I am quite sure that it will certainly involve practice. You to have practice becoming your own best spin-doctor. When things are cruddy, convince yourself of any aspect of good, because it is there if you look hard enough. Someone in a seminar once taught me to “change the story”, meaning instead of cussing that horrid driver that just cut you off, you say “oh, that poor man, I hope he gets to the hospital in time…as fast as he is driving, his wife is obviously in labor!”
Well, the more you “change the story”, the more you start to automatically think like that, and the more you practice praising God, the more that will be your natural reaction, your natural way of thinking and praying, thus your natural state of being will become positive and joyful. Try it. For the next 30 days. I triple-dog dare ya! What’s that worst thing that could happen? It may just change your life!
Romans 5: 1-3
"Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance."

2.) Being obedient.
God tells us to be joyful in Him, to delight in Him, to bask in the goodness and glory and hope of Him.
If we are really believing, really studying His word, seeking His truth, and living by faith, our joy can not help but grow. Nothing can compare to the home that awaits us in Heaven!
God commands us:
Psalm 37:4
"Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart."
So if we are following His commands, we are at least making our very best attempt to do just that; delight ourselves in Him.

3.) Accepting His gift.
Jesus was born so that we may know this joy. That’s the only way we can get it, but all of us can have it. All of us. There is plenty to go around. Regardless of past mistakes, previous blunders, mishaps big or small. Regardless of age, race, background, which side of the tracks you grew up on… None of that “stuff” matters. You are forgiven.
All you have to do is take the gift, accept the gift, open your heart to the gift that God has given you in the miracle of this baby, yet king, sent to save the world and to fill it with joy!

From a great old Christmas hymn:
Good Christian men rejoice
With heart and soul and voice
Now ye hear of endless bliss
Joy! Joy! Jesus Christ was born for this
He has opened heaven's door
And man is blessed forevermore
Christ was born for this
Christ was born for this…

Christ was born to save
Christ was born to save

My Christmas wish for you: May you know the true JOY of a deep and abiding relationship with Jesus, down in your heart to stay!

Question: Have you "Got Joy"? If not, what will you do to work on getting it?

Legacy

2008-12-17T12:59:00.000-08:00

I have often seen signs that say (or heard people verbally say): “Leave a legacy.”

But here’s the thing…You ARE leaving a legacy whether you mean to be or not.
...at least that's what I think...

From Merriam-Webster:

1leg·a·cy
Pronunciation:
\ˈle-gə-sē\
Function:
noun
Inflected Form(s):
plural leg·a·cies
Etymology:
Middle English legacie office of a legate, bequest, from Anglo-French or Medieval Latin; Anglo-French, office of a legate, from Medieval Latin legatia, from Latin legatus
Date:
15th century
1 : a gift by will especially of money or other personal property : bequest 2 : something transmitted by or received from an ancestor or predecessor or from the past

The term is used so often in referring to leaving something (object or philosophy) good to someone after you die. But I think you are establishing what your legacy will be over the course of your lifetime. It may be one your proud of, and it may be one you’ll regret.

Most people who know me think I am very out-going, but really I am very introverted, the type who likes to be a wallflower and just stand back and do a lot of observing. In my observing I have noticed particular families or groups of people that seem prone to things going wrong, drama, glitch after glitch in life, sickness, sadness, expecting the worst. Why is it that some people seem to have a long family history of “we will persevere”, while others follow the long-taught mantra, “life stinks”?

It has caused me to stop and think: What legacy am I leaving? 7 generations from now what will my descendants be like and what will be said that I passed down through those generations?

My Grandfather Clyde left a legacy of a strong work-ethic, unshakable faith, right priorities (God first, family next, everything else after that), using your talents, service to God and country. I will never forget those lessons he taught me and, because they have shaped who I am, they now live on in my children.

You ARE leaving a legacy…
What will it be?
You are creating that legacy at this very moment…

Is it a legacy of fear and doubt?
A legacy of poverty?
A legacy of depression?
A legacy of complacency?
A legacy of self-loathing?
Of settling for mediocrity?
Of negativity?
Of divisiveness?
Of drama?
Of blame?
Of victimization?

…OR…

Will you leave a legacy of positive thinking?
A legacy of taking action?
A legacy of knowing that God has created you for a specific purpose that only you can fulfill?
A legacy of gratitude?
A legacy of responsibility?
A legacy of self-worth, caring, concern?
A legacy of making a difference?
Of peace, pulling up your boot-straps, making the best of it?
Of inclusion?
Of continual improvement?
Of humor?
Of joy?
Of caring more than is practical?
Of brave, bold, courageous service for the Kingdom instead of playing it safe?

Will you teach your child that he’s not good enough and that dreams aren’t for people like him?

Or will you teach your child (and his children to come) that the dream in his heart was placed there by God and that NO dream is too big?
Will you teach him to honor God by achieving and living out that dream? Are YOU honoring God by achieving and living out the dreams that He has etched upon your heart?

Once the legacy is laid down, it will be woven into generation after generation. What will your legacy say about you 100 years from now?
If it isn’t what you want it to be, it isn’t too late to make the changes you need to make.

You are worthy of a legacy as big and as wonderful as God’s love is for you.

And your children deserve nothing less.

Question: You ARE leaving a legacy. What will it be? Will it honor God?

A Tale of 2 Women

2008-12-10T14:31:00.000-08:00

You might be familiar with a couple of hip biblical chicks, Mary and Martha. I probably would've been friends with them had I been alive then, though I would like to pause right here and now to thank God for having the good sense to know that the particular era of no hot shower, Ann Taylor Loft, or Kenra 25 (for keeping the angled bob perfectly angled) would not have been an ideal time for me! (I love how He so knows what He is doing!!!)

In case you are not familiar or have forgotten, allow me to refresh (I am paraphrasing here):
Luke 10: 38-42
There were these 2 sisters who lived in Bethany, named Mary and Martha. Jesus was passing through and Martha opened her home to Him and to the disciples. As any good hostess would do, she was prepping the meal, getting out the good dishes, probably stashing those stacks of mail she hadn’t gotten to under the kitchen island… Anyway, she’s in the kitchen scurrying around like a chicken with its head cut off. Meanwhile, Mary was off in the other room listening to Jesus talk. Martha was getting a little hot under the collar as she was going crazy & sis is just sittin’ around, so she tattled on Mary to Jesus, hoping He would lay down the (carpenter’s) hammer. Jesus, being so true-to-form, lovingly redirects her, and reminds her that actually she is the one who needs to re-think the plan here. "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."

That one thing is, of course, Him.

Now I am sure we'd be friends, those girls and me...they were strong women who were ahead of their time, and I like that. You know chicks didn't get a lot of "air time" back then, so that's cool. But also, I see so much of myself, have so much in common with them. Mary with the whole “thinker” thing going on (I love nothing more than sitting around thinking…I just rarely make time to do it!), and Martha, always doing…I bet she never sat down either! Surely we would've hit it off while scrubbing dust out of the clothes with a big rock down at the stream. (Oh God, thank you, thank you that I was not alive then!)

I have to believe that both women were spiritually gifted. Among other gifts, Martha obviously had the Spiritual Gift of Hospitality. I’m sure she had a lovely and warm home and always made people feel welcome.

Mary sat at the feet of Jesus in total humility, drinking in His every word. Surely she had the Spiritual Gift of Knowledge.

Allow, if you will, one of my favorite thoughts:
You know how most it is often portrayed that people have an angel sitting on one shoulder and a devil on the other...they whisper words of encouragement/discouragement, good/evil, right/wrong, at the person continually?

Well, I don't have that. (You may have read in an earlier blog post where I said that I have always been a goody-two shoes...maybe I grew up with The Angel of Guilt on one shoulder and my entire extended family on the other...staying on track isn't hard when you keep thinking "would my grandma be proud of me at this moment?")

I was somehow blessed...or cursed, depending on how you look at it...with MARY on one shoulder and MARTHA on the other! They sit upon my shoulders and scream (not whisper) words of get-things-done/take-time, run-run-run/slow-down, do-more/do-less, say-no-to-one-more-thing/you-haven’t-done-enough.

This is a theme that runs continually through my life, but is glaringly evident at this time of year when there is so much to do and such and ambiance to create. Yet all I really want to do is curl up under a blanket on the couch, no lights on but those on the tree, soft carols playing, fire in the fireplace, smells of my Yankee Christmas Eve Candle filling the house, reading a the story of the birth of the baby Jesus in the Bible and pouring over every Christmas letter and picture.

Ahhhhhhhhh….doesn’t that sound wonderful…like heaven on earth?

But here's how the real story goes:
Last week I was (hmmmm...word choice...) a stressed-out basket case trying to get my house all decorated for Christmas before a meeting I was hosting. Along with finishing the decorating, there were some gifts to get ready for the meeting, food to make, and because I’d be busy with that all evening, phone calls and emails I needed to take care of beforehand. Then the doctor’s office called and they did need to see my son after all, ASAP. How was I possibly going to get all of this done?

The list was endless and time was running out!

“The Shoulder Girls” as I like to call them, were perched a-top my collar bones, arguing with each other worse than Paris and Nicole when they had their famous 2-year feud!

My modern-day visual interpretation of the Shoulder Girls:
Mary: I picture her as a simple, sporty-though-refined, straight-forward girl. She sits on my right shoulder. I imagine her with a simple, yet stylish black knee-length shirt dress, in a wrinkle-free fabric, and practical leopard-print flats. She has long black hair pulled back in a chic pony.

Martha: The much fussier of the 2…or as some might surmise, high-maintenance…sits on my left, zebra-print sweater dress from Ann Taylor Loft, long strand of pearls doubled around her neck, black tights, black boots. She feels fabulous in this outfit…I know because I wore this exact combo just this very day! In my mind she has a choppy light brown crop with very well done highlights.

They sit upon me most of the time and banter back and forth. When I finally decide to relax and take it slow, which is rare, Martha is ranting in my ear about all that I should and could be doing.

When I am working through that to-do list and multi-tasking like a maniacal Franklin-Covey devotee, then Mary is chastising me for not living in the moment and stopping to meditate, pray, read, and recharge.

I often feel like I can’t win as these girls present their cases to me and their on-going closing arguments!!!

I really want to be like Mary (laid back and in the moment), but I am wired so much more like Martha (giant type A), thus the constant fighting it out between the Shoulder Girls.

On this particular day of the meeting I mentioned, Mary won…it just all couldn’t get done! I had no choice but to shove the un-hung Christmas ornaments into the corner, light the un-decorated tree, and we all shared a good laugh about my imperfection. I had a great time that night, relishing in the people and the moment!

And I don't want it to be perfect and all Martha-y just so I can look good to other people.
...if you that’s what you think you are missing the point!
I want it to be perfect to show the people in my life that they are worth going the extra mile, that I love them enough to go out of my way, to go overboard.

But I am learning that Jesus just calls me to make time to be with those people, to laugh with them at my lack of perfection, and to tell them that I love them...and they will feel it and know. I don’t have to DO everything. I can actually sit down and listen to Jesus speak to me.

That’s all He wants me to do anyway! The jury is still out on whether or not I can actually pull it off, but I will give it my best shot going forward.

So I guess this Christmas, with all there is to do and give and host and bake and wrap and ...........
I challenge you and I challenge my own self to live out those Martha moments if we simply must, but to just hurry up and get them over with, get them out of the way. Only then can we be what He is really calling us to be, which is Mary, sitting with Him and the others that we love, 100% focused on the moment, listening.

For that choice "is better, and will not be taken away..." (Luke 10:38-42)

Question: Are you more like Mary or Martha? In what way? Do you need to make some changes?

To Be The Star That Shone Upon You

2008-12-01T11:17:00.000-08:00

What would it have been like to have been there? To be part of the birth of Jesus..the magic...the miracle....

In my wondering of that very question, I wrote this a few years ago...
May the miracle of the birth of the Christ child dwell in your hearts this Christmas and throughout the New Year.

Oh, to be the star that shone upon you,
Or the straw beneath your skin,
The blanket wrapped around you,
Or the manger you were in;

The air that swirled around you
On that ancient, silent night,
To somehow, somewhere be there,
What must it have been like?

Was your every cry like music?
Was your breath like golden thread?
Your pillow like a throne
For Your Majesty’s sweet head?

Or did they even notice
In the silence of the night,
That all had changed forever
As heaven came to life?

Did they realize the magnitude
Of all that your life meant?
The birth, the death, the resurrection,
And finally the ascent;

That all of this was given
That sweet night in Bethlehem,
Because our God so loved the world
That we were given Him.

-A. McCool 11/04

Question: What would it have been like to have been there? Would you have liked to have been part of that night that changed the world forever? Why?

Enough

2008-12-01T10:48:00.000-08:00

In my opinion everyone should have a personal mission statement.

You may think I’m crazy, but frankly, I don’t really care! (I quit worrying about whether or not people thought I was crazy long ago!).

I hesitate to print my mission statement here because I think it is highly unique and confidential and only for my immediate family to see at this point…they know all of the thinking behind it. My mission statement has to do with, among other things, my purpose on earth and my passion for quietly easing the pain of others through works and philanthropy.

See, the key word in that last sentence is quietly…I want to be anonymous…don’t want anyone to know…just between me and the “Big G”!

But I bring it up today for a reason.

At church we have just finished a series call “Shake the System”. (Soooo good!) The series has talked about (in real basic terms I recap here) the fact that as Christians it is sometimes easy to become overwhelmed with the enormity of the needs of this world, so we justify our lack of jumping in by thinking we can’t do enough to make a difference. But God calls us to do whatever we can, no matter how “small” and to keep at it, influencing others to join in our cause. Pretty soon that ripple effect takes over and we’re rockin’ the boat, people!

I have long been accused of being a “goody two-shoes”, but I sure do LOVE rockin’ the boat for the Kingdom of God! THAT’S where I like to rebel! (By the way, I quit worrying about being called a Goody two-shoes long ago, too! There are far worse things to be called!)

As I have prayed a favorite prayer of mine over the last several years, the Prayer of Jabez, God has answered it in so many ways that I never would’ve expected! (That God, He’s like that, ya know! ...always keepin’ ya on your toes!) My territory has been enlarged in countless ways. Ways that are subtle & ways that have practically knocked me on my rhinestone-encrusted pockets!

For awhile I thought I could only make the kind of difference that I want to make with the great big stuff. I would like to give huge amounts, enormous amounts, through philanthropic acts, but the resources just aren’t there yet… Almost a year ago my friends Donna and Lisa reminded me that just doing it, doing something is what is important…and their words have sent me on a journey that is unexplainable in human words.

I look for these “encounters” everywhere.

But it is those subtle ways that I mention that are the things that make me go hmmm…. (which reminds me of a great song from the 80’s, but I digress and possibly need Ritalin!). In those subtle opportunities are big chances for service & growth & witnessing & giving & helping all in the name of Jesus…but they are also big chances to miss it altogether! To not even see the need or to think it is too small to matter or to think, “that one is easy…someone else will get it”. Or as they talked about at church, to think “that one seems scary and I want to be safe not brave.”

This is heavily on my mind today because I drove through “moneyland usa” where I live around noon today to get my beloved Burger King Diet Coke (king-sized) for a whopping (Burger King pun intended!) $2.06.

Sidebar: You might be praying for me about this as I am in the “weaning” period right now….A.) What is Diet Coke? I mean, really. That thick brown bubbly liquid can not be good for me! And B.) I decided awhile back that I can be doing something MUCH better with that $761+ a year. That could buy a lot for someone in need and it has really been on my heart!

As I pulled in the shopping area, I saw a man. He was standing on the corner. Freezing. Sign in hand that read “Will work for food”.

You’ve seen the type yourself I’m sure, a million times on busy corners. I always give them some money.

I know all of the arguments…but I always think “what if”.

What if it really were Jesus standing there, hungry, freezing…would I drive on by?

Well, I’d bring Him home with me if it really were….

How would you know?

Thing is, you don’t know…He’s not gonna make it that obvious for you to figure out!
But I could hear my overly-protective-of-his-only-child father in my head, so bringing this particular gentleman home with me today without hubby here was maybe not the best option.

So what do I do? What do I do?

I pulled into the drive-thru and started talking to God. (Always a good option when you don’t know what to do, by the way!)

I said: God, I don’t know this guy’s story, but you do. I have no work that I can offer him, no job for which I can hire him, so I can’t really do anything lasting at this particular moment, but I can’t shake the feeling that I was supposed to see him and do something. I have $2.06…in quarters and pennies, no less…again, not that helpful…so God, not to be bossy here, but ya got about 3 minutes to put a clear thought in my head about what action I am supposed to take.

And he did.

Something simple, appropriate, and that because it was God-driven, felt absolutely right.

“For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink... I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.” Matt 25: 35, 40

I talked briefly to the man as I handed him the hot lunch that I bought for him with the debit card that, thank God (literally) I had on me. As I drove away tears were streaming down my face. I prayed for him and I said to God, “Did I do enough, was that enough?” The clear answer back was, “Yes. You did something. And for him, right now, right here, that was enough.”

I hope this December 1st that maybe if only for a split second, I was the face of Jesus for that man, the face of God incarnate who was born to deliver us all…maybe he now has hope, if only a tiny ray, and maybe that tiny ray is … enough.

Question: What will you do the next time you see “the man on the corner”? Will you ask God to help you know, undoubtedly, that is was enough?

Card-Worthy Gratitude

2008-11-26T20:38:00.000-08:00

Two minutes ago my husband and I were talking as we kissed our boys goodnight. I was complaining that after what felt like 4 million photos taken earlier this evening, we still might not have the card-worthy shot for which I was hoping.

My son sat up and said, "Mom, you just make everything so complicated!"

I admit it! And I laughed out loud!

Point #1:
Well taken, Will. Thank you for calling a spade a spade, my dear. And yes, momma has never been accused of being low-maintenance!

Point #2:
It is a lot of pressure to find that "right shot" for the Christmas card. To make your card stand out among those received from 200 hundred of the nearest and dearest of every person on your list.

A few days ago I received the Christmas card from my friend of 30-some years. I was cursing her name for one-upping us all, until upon my opening it, I discovered her sheer brilliance! It read something along the lines of Happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas, Blessed New Year. ...and to top it all off it was the most beautiful card I had ever seen with breathtaking photos of her 3 sons. Again I say: brilliance!

I called her immediately! I told her of her magnificence and admitted that I would be totally stealing that idea next year. Not only did her card get the time and attention it so deserves by arriving in a lovely state of pre-Thanksgiving solitude, but also she's done! finished! check-marked off on her to-do list!

And so begins the tale of the quest for that one card-worthy shot.

It started our very simply, really. The grandparents would come over for the family celebration of the boys' 11th birthday (side bar: how can I be that old? Admittedly I am 39, but in my head I am 24!), we'd do dinner, cake, and presents, and then just, real quick, grab that photo.

How hard could it be?

After color-coordinating 6 people, plotting out photo-op combinations and placement such that Tony Dungy might want to see my play book, and prepping the people (you will have to change into a red shirt, don't start complaining, etc.), we were good to go.

Then the drama began: after the first shot the boys got up and started to leave, shouting "we got one", we kept making them come back and try again since Gram's eyes were closed, Grandpa was making a face, Will burped, thank God they were digital so we could check after each one and make sure that at least they were good of me, I mean...really, Grandma started callin' the shots (interesting since I like to be the boss), the men started complaining heavily that this was taking too long...not at all understanding the aforementioned point #2...so now I am (loudly) reminding them that since I will be choosing their nursing homes, they might just wanna simmer down now & do what I say!...and finally, the dog was supposed to be in the picture, but in all of the chaos we didn't even notice that she was devouring Max's chocolate chip cookie cake!

When I think about THE picture that we take every year for the card, I am reminded of a recurring theme: Every single year we have had some National Lampoon-type back story...and yet we manage to capture a great moment springing out of it.

The same is true of life: Amid the utter chaos of our lives are those perfect snapshots of love, family, bliss, everything falling into place, even if only for a second...literally!
...And I am grateful that those are the moments that we choose to capture. Choose to remember.

Those moments that are card-worthy.

The men in our family were just "over it" and complaining relentlessly! But as I teased them that these are the moments of which funeral poster boards are made, I meant it. So sorry, my dear Will, if I do make it more complicated than it needs to be, but when we are dead and gone this will be the pictorial history that we leave behind.

And thank God we are able to capture those moments in our hearts and on film. I am so filled with gratitude that those fleeting moments can live forever as pictures...what a blessing!

Question: What is your most cherished photograph? Why?

I Hate My Stomach, but Thank God it's Not My Face!

2008-11-21T19:53:00.000-08:00

I've always had issues with my body...er...temple.

I've been taller than my peers since before I can remember, reaching full height and a size 9 shoe (leopard-print of course!) in 5th grade.

Puberty reared it's ugly head long before I thought it should have & before any of my friends were experiencing it.

Braces, acne medicine, and every monthly issue of Seventeen Magazine still weren't enough to make this temple feel like the Crystal Cathedral!

All that aside, I can say that I was a late bloomer and feel much better about myself late-thirties than I did late-twenties.

Hence the moment that I looked down at at my saggy-fleshed, stretch-mark-laden stomach and thought with accepting resolve & a heavy sigh, "Well, I hate my stomach, but THANK GOD it's not my face!"

See, God doesn't care what I look like , as long as I am making the most of what he has given me and I am healthy. And no matter what I (as we all are) am beautiful to him even at my worst. He does want me to love and accept myself, though, and not spend time obsessing about my body and its imperfections. That time and energy spent obsessing should be put to better use for something that expands His Kingdom!

Not that I think he wants us to let it all go & just give up...something tells me He just wants us to take some cotton pickin' action, get it under control, and move ON!

I could have fed a small nation with the money I have spent on diet aids and personal training.
Then I finally heard the call: "Take some cotton pickin' action, get it under control, and go feed that small nation that is waiting on you to better the Kingdom!"

And so what if my stomach isn't my fav.? Everybody has something they don't like...what we are supposed to do is learn to focus on the beautiful parts of our outer and inner selves and then teach the young girls in our lives to do the same...and then go better that Kingdom!

Question: What's your favorite part of your physical appearance? Take a moment to thank God for it.

Come, Lord Jesus, Come

2008-11-21T12:46:00.000-08:00

Come, Lord Jesus, Come...

Can you hear it in your head?

The praise song I mean?

...great song...but that is not what I am referring to here...

I mean literally...

Yep.

The Rapture.

Been praying for it for a while now.

Open heavens, angels, 7 golden lampstands, thunder, locusts, seals, scrolls, emerald-encircled throne, trumpets, 24 crown-wearing elders...the whole 9 yards! Seriously! (You can read all about it in Thessalonians & Revelation if you are not familiar...)

Why?
A.) I'm exhausted!
I have a lot going on... wakeupgoteachkindergartenfor3hourscomehomeworklikeamaniacfor3morehourspleaseJesus
helpmefindafewminutesforprayerandmeditationwalkdogboyscomehomefromschoolgetsreally
loudstartrunningthemaroundtobasketballspellbowlbaseballdohomeworkcookdinnercleanitup
meetingatchurchmake5deliveriescallsevenpeopleturnonthecomputer20emailsdownloadthat
actuallyalldoneedrespondingtohelpwithhomeworkmassagehusband'sfeetfallinbedgetupdoitall
overagain...
(No breaks between words here to drive home the point that during my day I often do not have time to catch my breath, eat lunch before 3:00 or wee-wee!)
and frankly I don't know what will slow the pace short of just shuttin' the whole operation down.

B.) There is a lot going on in the world today that I can not explain:
God calls me, and all of us, to Shake the System (shake, baby, shake), and I am trying my darnedest as are most of my Christian friends. I know that every bit of what we do honors the God of Justice that we serve and still, no matter how hard we try, there will still be those who suffer. If I think Jesus is making a slow descent (meaning I feel He's on His way), I won't give up and stop fulfilling my purpose...I'll just know that some serious help's comin'.

I don't mean to make light here.
And I know He is not planning "the big entrance" just because I am exhausted....
It's just that I'm not afraid.
I mean, I have plenty of unanswered questions that I have been researching in my Book 'O Truth (Bible)...it's where all the good secrets are, but I am not afraid.

Things always remind me of songs...the lyrics of another great one:
Come to me all who are weary
And find rest for your soul
Come to me all who are burdened
I will lead you home

Lesson already learned years ago:
Whatever it is, it'll be in His time not mine!
I guess in the meantime if I want to find a little rest for my oh-so-weary soul I need to go hunker down with The Good Book.

So Dear God, not that you (of all "people") need my permission, but you can go ahead and come anytime now...I mean I'm ready...though I'm guessing you want to "press in" on all of us a little more firmly first.

And I will do my best to press on. Rev. 2: 3 "You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name and have not grown weary."

Hmmmm....to endure that kind of mental pain and anguish (ya know, the locusts and all) just might take a new pair of animal print shoes...

Rev. 22: 20 "He who testifies to these things says, 'Yes, I am coming soon.' Amen. Come, Lord Jesus."

Question: Are you ready? Are you afraid?

That God's a Funny Guy!

2008-11-21T12:14:00.001-08:00

Do you ever wonder what God is thinking as He watches you?

I do.

In fact, my wondering about that has prompted me to be in continual dialogue with Him throughout the day, throwing out statements, asking Him questions & sharing personal jokes with Him...ya know, just so He and I are (hopefully) both on the same page... and also to clarify in case at any time He is hanging His head, shaking it slowly, thinking, what the heck is she doing...I mean, I know He already knows and all... but just in case...

I do believe that if we want to be in deep personal relationship with Him (which is what He wants us to want), we must engage Him in the same banter that we would share with our dearest loved ones on earth...yet still mixed with a healthy amount of reverence and a slight dose of fear.

I just have to believe that God has a sense of humor since, first of all, He created it and second, how would He put up with us otherwise????

I mean, I ask for things, then when I get them I'm still complaining & wanting more!
A prime example:
I prayed to get pregnant. Let me clarify...asked, pleaded, begged with relentless pursuit.

When God answered that prayer I guess He decided to show me what all that beggin' could get a girl: twins with all the trimmings! Double the weight gain, double the elbows and knees in the bladder... Did I mention the stretch marks? Mercy! Don't you even think I could breast feed at the mall by throwing a blanket over us!!

Now, please don't mistake my thoughts for one second as my making light of it. TRULY the conception, pregnancy, and delivery of my little angels was nothing short of a miracle and I don't take one ounce of that for granted. But I am sure God got a good laugh as He watched me doubt His plans for my life knowing what He had in store for me!

What did I learn from all of that? Well, it was the ultimate lesson in "God is in control" and it's all gonna happen in his time, not mine...

Yes, in this one and oh, so much more of my life, God got the last laugh!

Question: In what ways do you think you make God chuckle as He lovingly gazes down on you?

For the Beauty of the Earth

2008-11-21T11:34:00.001-08:00

"For Thyself, best gift divine

To our Race so freely given...

Lord of all, to Thee we raise

This our hymn of grateful praise."

For the Beauty of the Earth is a great old hymn that I have grown up singing. The lyricist wrote it as he reflected on the beauty of nature. For it is true that God has given us such a rich and beautiful pallet to absorb in nature and I feel especially blessed to live in the Midwest where, despite the cold which I don't like, we have to glorious change of seasons.

I probably view nature with the same awe as does a 5-year old boy (since I do have quite a lot of experience with "those guys"). I am mesmerized by the earth's rich and vibrant color, by sunsets, by a clear/still/silent winter night, I am fascinated by snowflakes...each individual one of them. I love leaves, flowers, rocks, butterflies, blades of grass, mud, centipedes, raindrops, worms....coooool....

Really, this is the stuff that I look at and think, "how did God dream that up?"

He must see each sunset and continue to marvel at it...

But do you know what He marvels at even more than the beauty of His earth?

I believe that God must think that His own best and most beautiful creation is not the earth, but those of us in it. For He crafted our every cell, every breath, every part of our being and to Him it is good.

WE are the beauty of His earth.

Therefore, it is our job to maintain that beauty. It is our responsibility to preserve His most beautiful creation by honoring Him with our physical, mental and spiritual beauty.

Sometimes we forget what beautiful creations we are! We don't take care of ourselves...we let our minds lapse...we let our spiritual beauty wither...we let our physical beauty take a back seat to everything else...

But God deserves our very best and so do those around us...and we deserve to create the very best versions of ourselves possible. It is our living tribute to God...and He will say, "It is good"!

Question: In what ways are you honoring God by taking care of yourself? Where could you improve?

Following is my favorite quote ever...I think it sums this up perfectly!

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.We ask ourselves, “Who am I to be brilliant,gorgeous, talented, fabulous?”Actually, who are you not to be?You are a child of God.Your playing small does not serve the world.There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.We are all meant to shine, as children do.We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone.And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.As we are liberated from our own fear,our presence automatically liberates others.
-Marianne Williamson

What 3 Things?

2008-11-19T13:17:00.000-08:00

A: The Bible, my make-up, and leopard-print shoes.
Q: What 3 things would you want with you if you were stranded on a deserted island?

First of all, ...ahh...to be stranded...I can think of nothing lovelier! ...Peace...quiet...no email...no phone...no TV...I repeat...peace...and...q..u..i..e..t...aahhhhh.....

Second, let's just assume that my husband and 2 boys are with me...it would be just too much to bear to think otherwise, so they are obviously on the other side of the island happily catching fish for dinner with their bare hands, of course.

So why, then, those particular 3 things to have with my stranded self?
1. The Bible.
Need I say more? It's the Bible. The B-I-B-L-E. Yes, that's the book for me. (Sorry, I digress as I am reminded of an old-school song!) Just picture it. Sitting in the sand for hours, under a palm tree, tropical breeze blowing, cabana boy bringing me a drink with a little umbrella (oops! There I go again...), with uninterrupted time~ hour upon hour (remember the peace, quiet, no phone, no email thing?)~ to basque in the Word and unlock the secrets of the Kingdom of God? ...time to process them...time to journal about them...and quiet enough to hear Him speak to me through them.

2. My make-up.
I really do not care that this is completely impractical! When I look pulled-together, I feel pulled-together! Having on make-up makes me feel ready for the day, presentable, polished, smarter, and like I care enough about myself to put forth some effort (which is actually the case). ...And of course, my vitamin c with sunscreen is in my make-up bag, so that my family and I are protected from the harsh uva and uvb rays during our "stranded phase" as it will come to be known...I mean, really, only an irresponsible women would let herself become stranded without it... (!!!!)

3. Leopard-print shoes.
This just goes without saying! Maybe a peep-toe, platform, heel is a little much for island life, so possibly I should go for a sassy leopard flat here? (I very well may have an animal print addiction, just so that is "out" right here and now!) My theory is that I can think better in leopard-print shoes (and also zebra) than plain black, flip-flips with sequins, and even strappy snakeskins. They bring out my God-given creativity and sass! I think that if stranded on a deserted island wearing leopard-print shoes, I really could start a fire with 2 sticks, build a grass hut, kill/clean/and cook my own dinner (cause let's face it, even if the men in my family are with me, I am still going to be the one calling the shots people!)...all of that stuff...bare-handed...just as long as I am not bare-footed!

Question: What are your 3 things and why?

The Sacrifice of Praise

2008-11-19T13:07:00.000-08:00

You have probably heard the phrase "the sacrifice of praise" and you may even know what it means.

But have you really experienced it? I will admit to not getting it for a long time. But I sure do now.

God wants our praise.
He wants our worship.
It is what we are made to do.
He even gifts us to offer our praise and worship in different ways…through our various talents such as vocal or instrumental music, art, loving the unlovable, giving our time, serving through physical labor, etc.

It is so easy to praise Him when things are going well. When things are good. When things are exciting. When you can see God working. (Anyone can praise through the good times.)

However, God calls us to live right, which includes praise and worship, even when it is not easy. When things are not going well. When you feel like crap. When it’s all falling apart. (This shows a maturing faith, a faith that you are serious about.)

THAT is the sacrifice.

It is sacrificial to dig deep and find a way to rejoice in the moment that you feel you are dwelling in the pit of hell. You don’t want to praise, you want to lay in a heap of your own despair and cry and stomp and throw a fit.

Whether in the really big, deep trenches of life or the little daily annoyances, God wants us to find the reasons to praise Him. This kind of sacrifice brings God ultimate joy because he knows the deepest caverns of our hearts and He knows how hard this is for us as humans. That’s why it is called the sacrifice of praise.

In the big stuff…
When I couldn’t get pregnant and "thoroughly disgusted" didn’t even scratch the surface on that subject, it was hard to find something to praise about. But over time I learned to praise God for the experience, to praise Him for the chance to help others who might go through it, to praise Him for helping me learn to rely on Him, to praise Him for the reminder that He is in control (Jer. 29).

And in the small…
He wants our praise for the chaos of life: Thank you God, for a rich, and exciting life…it sure ain’t boring at my house!
He wants our praise for the worries of life: Thank you God, for the opportunity to solve problems in a creative way and to give You the glory…cuz’ I know you are gonna help me figure this out!
He wants us to praise him for the annoyances of life: Thank you God for your protection…surely my running late has helped me avoid some kind of accident or problem.

And He wants our praise in the disappointments of life, too... I had a series of about 4 really big disappointments this past spring. A couple of things that I had worked very hard for that had fallen through, and something where I truly believed God was leading me in a certain direction only to have the door slammed. I was devastated and exhausted, especially with it all happening at once.
But somehow through my earlier "God School" education (this is my version of "home school", but where God is teaching you stuff that you must know in order to proceed on the path He has laid out for you), I knew what I must do: dry the tears if only long enough to thank Him for what I knew He must be doing... even though I had not one clue what it was at the time. (I can actually look back on it six months later and see what "the point" was! I truly praise Him for the learning!)

That, my friends, is faith.

It’s not too late…
No matter how far into the pit of hell you have fallen, I am convinced that finding a way to praise Him through it is the first step in climbing out.

Question: What can you praise Him for today no matter how bad things seem?

My Husband IS the Diamond

2008-11-17T15:13:00.001-08:00

The other day I heard a commercial on the radio for a jeweler. They were advertising some special where you could come in and get some great big sparkly diamond for a great price...

or

...you could UPGRADE.

Then they went on to talk about how you may have gotten a tiny little (sounded almost dull and yucky) diamond when you first got married and you could come and trade it in (!) and get a newer, better, bigger, sparklier version.

Of course, they romanticized all of the benefits and reasons for doing that.

I had never really thought about that before.

My diamond isn't very big. And I know that even though my beloved had to save for it, it wasn't really that expensive as far as diamond engagement rings go.

Then this thought popped in my head:

My husband IS the diamond!

Ok, stop rolling your eyes! I am serious!

MY diamond walks in at 5:30 every day. MY diamond puts up with me even when I am not nice. MY diamond does the laundry. MY diamond eats what I cook (even when it stinks!) without complaining, whether it is fish sticks or Fillet Mignon. MY diamond isn't show-y. He is quiet, strong, subtle, loyal, smart, wonderful...a gift from God and truly my soul mate.

So when I got home from that car ride where I heard that commercial, I went into the bathroom and wrote on his mirror with a dry-erase marker, "My husband IS the diamond". Later when I told him the story, I swear he didn't have a dry eye...

Maybe with our men just like our jewelry, some of us have gotten in just too big a hurry to up-grade. (Some of us, however, should have upgraded sooner!!) Maybe we need to consider all that is wonderful about our men...even if they seem a little more like a "diamond in the rough" than a "polished gemstone".

Question: What do you most appreciate about your husband? Tell him!!

Hooks

2008-11-14T12:48:00.001-08:00

Hooks.

All I want is hooks.

In every bathroom. Every time.

I really don't think I am asking for that much...really....am I?

So why is it that I continually "eliminate" while staring at the two holes where the hook used to be on the stall door?

...While juggling my purse clinched between chin and chest, right hand holding up my calf-length coat, left hand trying to help thyself shimmey up the tights while somehow preventing my skirt from getting tucked into the back of them.... Oh, crud! Lip gloss falls out of the chin-and-chest-clinched purse and rolls under the stall door and out by the sink...all this while wearing 3-inch leopard-print heels and cussing the name of whom ever has done this to me.

Cause WHERE is the cotton-pickin' hook, for the love of Pete!

Seriously? Where IS the hook? Every hook in America...With every lost sock from the laundry and every pen that was only used once?!?!?!?

Once on a rare occasion when I did find (music swells, spotlight casts) A HOOK, I went straight to Customer Service and thanked them for having a hook. The associate looked at me as though she might be pushing a secret button under the counter to call for back-up. My son said I had just terribly embarrassed him. I was just simply expressing my gratitude for the simple things in life.

And DO I need to seek some good counsel just because I just don't want to place my purse on the floor of a less-than-sterile gas station bathroom? What if I forget that I sat it there and then go home and set it on my kitchen island?

I really don't need tons of stuff in life...

To be in the presence of God.
To wake up next to my beloved husband.
To be loved by my children (even when I embarrass them or make them mad).
To have my dog wag her tail when she sees me.

And to have a @(*#^(*% hook on the back of the bathroom door!
EVERY TIME!!!!!!!!!

Question: What simple thing in life have you been taking for granted?